Mr and Mrs Specter: You Will SeeI'm Always Here
by Carebearmaxi
Summary: Harvey has a spiritual visiting the same day his mom has died. It happens again years later. This will be a two part story probably. Some of this story refers to two fan fictions I wrote many years ago: Infidelity and Mother and Merry Christmas, Darling. You don't have to read those to enjoy this one. Inspired by 9x08. Thank you for reading.
1. Chapter 1

**HI Folks! Well, since the ending of 9x08, I was inspired to write another Mr. and Mrs. Specter fic. As many of you know, in my timeline Lily died on the day of Mike and Rachel's wedding. Here's how I reconciled poor Harvey who had lost both his parents now. This will be at least a two chapter with many years span in the middle. Please let me know how you like it. Thank you to all the followers and favoriters. Would love to hear what you like about my stories. Love, Carebearmaxi**

You Will See…I'm Always Here

Chapter 1 – The Visit

_"Harvey?"_

_ "Mom? Dad?" Harvey answered. He stared at the shimmering shapes in front of him. He reached out and he felt his mom take his hand. His father placed his on the top of theirs. Suddenly the shimmering stopped, and his parents were flesh and blood again. He stared at them and could feel their touch on his hand. _

_ Harvey looked next to him and saw Donna sleeping peacefully. He went to wake her so he could share this experience with her, but his mother admonished tenderly._

_ "Leave Donna sleep, honey. We are here for you. You can tell her about us later. She'll understand," Lily said._

_ "I love you, mom," Harvey blurted as he rose from his bed and hugged his mother. He could feel her arms around him, and he could hold her unlike the last time he had seen her in the hospital bed in her weakened condition from the brain tumor._

_ "I love you, too, Harvey," Lily said as she stroked his back and squeezed him. He kissed his mom on the cheek and then he hugged his father whom he had not seen at all before he died. Harvey remembered the pain and the guilt of that time. It had been somewhat assuaged by Harvey's attendance at Gordon's funeral. That brought back the horrid memory of how Harvey was still angry at his mother although he had attempted to bury the hatchet._

_ He took a step back and looked at his parents. They were not old and wrinkled as he had remembered the last time, he had seen them, but their spirit selves had returned them to their youth. They looked to be at the ages when Harvey was a little boy. Death had returned them to being young and vibrant instead of older, broken down and ill. _

_ "Dad, I am so sorry. I meant to come see you more, but I put my ambitions ahead of what really matters."_

_ "Hey, you're my boy. I understand. I know I let you and your mom and Marcus down from time to time. I was the last one to hold a grudge. I'm just glad you married Donna and have children of your own. They are beautiful children."_

_ "You've seen Amanda and Gordon?" Harvey asked then he smirked and laughed at himself._

_ "Of course, you have. We named our son after you. Donna insisted."_

_ "I know she did. I also know on my birthday we share a drink as we have done since you turned 21," Gordon Specter said._

_ Harvey could not believe his eyes. Was he dreaming? Was this a visiting? Were they angels? Harvey's religious faith was never very strong. He just did not believe that way. There had only been a handful of occasions when he had raised his eyes to heaven and prayed. One was when Amanda was born. She was a preemie and incurred complications. The other two times were more recent. Before Gordon's birth, as a matter of fact, when she was pregnant with Gordon, Donna was hurt in a car accident driving Mandy to the doctor's because Amanda had contracted pneumonia. Amanda, his little angel at eight months, was found to be allergic to antibiotics and suffered severely on a different floor of the hospital from her mother at the same time._

_ Then angels had come to him in the forms of Mike Ross and Dana Scott. They showed him what life would have been like if he had never been born._

_ This was different. He was in his home. He was in bed with his wife sleeping peacefully with his children in their beds. Amanda in her pink bedroom and Gordon in the crib in the nursery. He and Donna had just returned home from Mike and Rachel Ross' reception. Before they had arrived at the hotel for the reception, Harvey had been contacted by Lily's nurse at the nursing home and had left a message. It said she was sorry to give him the news, but his mom had died peacefully that morning._

_ Donna was there and held him as they had danced and tried to rejoice in their friend's joy. Momentarily Donna and he had forgotten about the pain just enjoying each other's company and physical closeness. They did not tell the newlywed Ross' about his mom's passing. There was no need to dampen their joy._

_ "Mom, I'm sorry," Harvey said again._

_ "Oh, Harvey. I never stopped loving you. I am your mother. I was sorry for what I did as well. So, when I joined your father, we just wanted to let you know that we're ok," Lily said to her son._

_ "But mom, I was too late. I should never have let you…" Harvey said interrupting his mother._

_ "Son, we know you loved us," Gordon Specter said. "Now, you live a good life son with Donna and your beautiful children. Know that your mother and I are here for you. You simply have to look up…."_

_ They faded away out of his arms and his view…_

Harvey woke up suddenly in a cold sweat.

"Harvey!" Donna exclaimed in a whisper. "Are you ok? You're sweating."

"I had a dream or a vision or something. I'm not sure," Harvey said to his wife as he laid propped up by the headboard of the bed. Donna had turned to him and now sat beside him. He placed a hand on her cheek as if to be sure she was flesh and blood and not some vision of his subconscious.

Donna placed her hand over his on her cheek. She lay against him placing her arms around him. She spoke softly in his ear.

"What did you see?" She kissed his cheek.

"My mom and dad. They stood right there," he explained as he pointed to his side of the bed in the darkened room. "I hugged my mom so tight and kissed her cheek. I hugged my dad, too," Harvey said as tears began to run down his cheeks. Donna thumbed them away and just allowed him to talk.

"I apologized to the both for not being there. They said they came back to say they were ok. They didn't hold a grudge for my lack. They understood."

"Oh, Harvey, of course, they did. You are their son. They both loved you so much," Donna said feeling helpless to help him out of this mire of guilt he had been feeling. Although they had danced and had a wonderful time at Mike and Rachel's wedding, she knew that his mom's passing that morning in his absence had gnawed away just a little of his happiness for Mike and Rachel. While he had given her his jacket to cover her bare shoulders in her Matron of Honor gown, she had seen the quick nod he had given to heaven. She could barely hear him at the time, but he had told her that he knew his mom would find his dad and that they would be together again.

"Donna, am I good man?" Harvey asked quietly. He had asked that question many times of his wife. She always had an answer. She always told him he was a good man even when he felt that he had not done what was right.

"Harvey, you are the best man I know. I love you. No matter what you do your loyalties and your heart is always in the right place."

"Not always, Donna. You know how I felt when my mother suddenly appeared back in my life. I was still resentful."

"But you made sure she had the best care until she passed. You made up for those times. You came around and forgave her. She was able to see our children and spend time with us. There was no better care that a son could have given his mother. You were there."

"Yes, but it was too late, Donna."

"No, it was not. Heaven sent their spirits to you because you needed to let go of your guilt. Your mom and dad came to you to tell you they love you and to live your life with your family now. They would be here for you. You simply needed to look up."

They remained silent in the dark. Donna settled against Harvey as his breathing had slowed and his heart had stopped pounding against her hand. She thought he had drifted off to sleep. Then out of the blue he started talking again.

"Donna, when your father died, you were a teenager, did this happen to you? Did you get a signal or a vision to allow you to have closure?"

Donna did not know how to answer that question. Her father's death was very different. She had not been in the room when he had died as her mother had only allowed her older sister, Carol to accompany her to the hospital. Donna and their youngest sister, Julia, had not been allowed to accompany Roberta and Carol. They were told there was no reason to leave school. Donna had wanted to hold a grudge against her mother for having prevented the 14-year-old Donna and her 11-year-old sister closure. Donna had held a semi-grudge for a few years because of this. The semi-grudge had dissipated over many years but disappeared altogether when Donna gave birth to her own children many years later. She could understand how protective her mother was from holding off watching a loved one die. Carol had been an adult at just 18 and had been studying at nursing school, so Roberta felt Carol had already been exposed to death.

There had been tumultuous upheavals in Donna's young life at that time, but she realized that if they clung to one another, and Roberta accepted the little help she had taken from her husband's brother, Jacob, their life would be hard but not unbearable.

"Donna? You're quiet."

Harvey had settled down and was realizing what a gift he had been given by the spirit visit of his parents. He now felt that Donna was swimming in waters alone. It was his turn now to reach out a hand.

He stroked her shoulder and rubbed his knuckles in a circle at the base of her spine. She always like it when he did that especially when she was carrying Gordon.

"Are you ok?" He asked again hoping to elicit a response.

"I was just trying to think how to answer your question," Donna responded softly as her vision focused out beyond their bed to the drawn drapes of the large terrace window.

"What do you mean?" Harvey asked drawing her even closer. He could feel the softness of her hair at his chin and warmth on his chest where her hand stroked his t-shirted chest and stomach.

"I never got closure like that. It was just an acceptance that he left mom, my sisters, and myself with hardly anything but grateful help from Uncle Jacob."

"Yet you never resented it," Harvey remarked as he kissed her forehead.

"I'm pragmatic, Harvey. I had to think logically and not get caught up in resentments. We didn't have the money and I didn't have the time. My one consuming thought was my desire to go away to college and become a successful actress. When, however, I was not as successful as I needed to be, I became a secretary."

"I am so glad you did."

Harvey genuinely smiled in the dark into her hair for the first time since they had arrived home. The children had been asleep as he looked in on them. He could not help smiling as he watched them sleep. He was sorry to have not been able to tuck them in, but he would make it up to them tomorrow night. No, this smile was different. This smile was a cleansing. It was a smile of gratitude. Gordon's spiritual self said the words that Harvey now lived by. He was living his life with his beautiful wife and his beautiful children, and Harvey loved it.

"I am so glad I had the guts enough to ask to come to your desk."

"You didn't ask if I remember correctly. You stated you wanted to come to my desk, so I wasn't going to pass up an opportunity for a beautiful redhead to sit outside my office and do my bidding."

"Listen, mister, I don't think I did your bidding. I never did your bidding."

Harvey laughed. "No, you didn't. You were just amazing."

"Were?" Donna asked raising an eyebrow and turning his head to look at her.

"Are."

"That's better."

They were silent for a moment. Donna slid out of Harvey's arms and lay down next to him. She turned to her other side and yawned. Harvey felt an invitation and slid down the bed and laid down spooning his body to hers. He loved holding her like this. He could inhale the wonderful lavender/vanilla scent of her shampoo and her own wonderfully feminine scent consumed his nostrils. He could feel the weight of full breasts on top of his arm and entwine his long legs with her own long legs. Normally it was difficult for him not to become aroused when he lay with her like this, but he chalked it up to the spirit experience of his parents that had prevented it tonight. All he wanted to do right now was to just hold her. He needed to feel her and know that she would not suddenly disappear.

"Truthfully, Harvey, I had closure with my father's death. He never came to me in a shimmering vision, but I would hear things people would say to me in my father's voice or quoting a line that he used to say to me when I was little. A phrase that only I would understand. These things happened at crucial times in my life. The last one was the day before we married."

Harvey was intrigued. He was tired and peaceful now, but his curiosity reigned. He had to know.

"What did he say?"

"It came by the agency of my older sister as she was preparing me to walk down the aisle. She put my veil over my face and then told me "You're the star of your own life. Go make a good one with Harvey."

"How do you know that was from your father?"

"Because he knew of my great desire to be a successful theater actress. When I was about eight or nine, he encouraged my desire by saying you are the "star of your own life". Make a good one. This time, though, he knew somehow who you were and he approved."

"Well, it looks like we have both our parents' blessing. There was no doubt about your mother. The woman loves me."

"Yes, she does. It doesn't mean she won't kick your ass if you do something wrong," Donna said starting to laugh.

"Oh, I know," Harvey said responding in laughter as well.

"Can you go back to sleep now, or do you want to keep talking?" Donna asked after their giggles had faded into the air.

"I'm good. I love you, Donna."

"I love you, Harvey. Good night."

No more was said between then. Harvey lay spooned against his wife and held her close. Donna took her husband's hand and held it against her heart as she fell back to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi Folks! Here's Chapter 2 of my sequel to Infidelity and Mother. I hope you are liking this one. It's hard knowing that Suits Finale is Wednesday. However, i am happy that A. Korsh created a great show with great characters with terrific actors to become them. Anyhow, let me know what you think and if I should go on. Thank you to all my favoriters and followers. I appreciate it and it spurs me on! Love - Carebearmaxi.**

Mr. and Mrs. Specter: You'll See…I'm Always Here

Chapter 2

_Seventeen years later…_

_ "_Gordon!" Harvey shouted to his 17-year-old tall, blonde, long-haired son rushing up the stairs in a huff.

"No, Dad! I am not doing it!"

"You apologize to your sister. She came all the way in from Boston to give you that present. Your cousin was kind enough to give it up for you!"

"Dad, I am not playing that sax! There is nothing wrong with mine. No matter what you say! I am not my grandfather no matter what you may think!"

"Gordon…" Harvey started to shout but his name ended in a whisper.

"Harvey," Donna said coming up behind her husband and placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Let him be for now. He'll come around. You'll see."

"Donna, I just thought that if he got dad's saxophone, he would be happy. I just wanted him to understand how important this was."

Donna turned her husband gently around as he stood at the foot of the staircase of the West Chester home. She lowered her gaze, so she could look into his eyes. She smiled a little smile at the thought that when she first knew this man his biological family was the last ones he cared about except for his father and brother.

"What, Donna? Do I get my lecture on what I'm doing wrong as his father?" Harvey said bringing his hands to rub Donna's upper arms. The affection and touching came so easy for them now where once way before they were married the urge to touch was never indulged.

"No, not a lecture. Just an enlightening and one I'm sure you figured out a long time ago since you were once a boy of 17," Donna said.

"Yes, but I was messed up, you know how my family life was," Harvey said. "Gordon's childhood is hardly to be compared. He has two parents who love and respect each other and two sisters who adore him."

"Are you telling me we should have tried for a fourth?"

"Donna," Harvey responded to her jest in his indulgent way. He tilted his head to the side giving her his "you know that's not what I meant" look.

"No, I know. He doesn't realize that. At that age, boys are boys. He's still a teenager. He's still wrapped up in his own world. His present is his reality."

"I get it," Harvey said taking his wife into his arms holding her against him. She had removed her office attire sky-high heels so she fit under his chin.

They had picked up Gordon from band practice and dropped Kenzie off at her voice lesson which would not end for approximately another half hour. Their eldest child, Amanda, lived on her own in Boston where she attended Harvard University pre-law with every attention of being accepted in their law school and becoming a lawyer like her father.

Harvey looked up toward the door to Gordon's room. He smirked as he thought he should continue the discussion regarding playing of Gordon's grandfather's saxophone for the big senior band jazz concert next week. Then he looked at Donna.

"Ok, have it your way. I will let this go for now. Let's grab a snack before we have to pick up Kenzie."

Later that night, Harvey, quietly, so as not to awaken Donna retrieved his father's sax from his bedroom closet where Mandy had deposited it only two days' prior.

_"Well, daddy here it is," Mandy had said presenting the saxophone in its' case like a present to her father._

_ "Did you have a hard time with Uncle Marcus or Fiona?"_

_ "No, Uncle Marcus was happy that someone would play it again. Fiona was happy as hell to see it go. She hated playing that sax."_

_ "I gave it to your Uncle for safekeeping because it was too painful for me to keep it. I hope your brother will play it."_

_ Mandy sat down across from her father in his home office the previous Saturday afternoon. Mandy had been working in the mailroom of a large Boston firm part time while she was at Harvard. She turned 20 years old the previous March and was glad she decided to pursue being a lawyer. Presently, she had the weekend off and decided to drive down to see her parents without her boyfriend, Richard, who had his own family obligations this weekend. She had picked up her grandfather's sax from her Uncle's house only the week before. Harvey had sent his daughter an emergency message that he wanted to surprise her brother with it before the big senior jazz band concert in June._

Harvey remembered the rest of the conversation with his eldest child as he removed the sax from its' case. Amanda, more than any of his other children, knew how much her grandfather's music meant to her father. Harvey always loved his father's music. Harvey could barely sing let alone pick up a musical instrument and play it. Harvey had attempted it a long time ago when a child, but after age eight he decided he would rather pursue sports. Marcus had not inherited the musical gene (if there was such a thing) either but Marcus loved their father's music almost as much. Apparently, though, Fiona, Marcus' eldest daughter had inherited that gene just like her cousin, Gordon.

The saxophone looked a little worse for wear. The brass was not as shiny, and the keys looked well played. The mouthpiece looked like it needed to be replaced. Harvey was no expert, but he would make sure the instrument was in tiptop shape before Gordon would play it for his solos in the concert. Harvey knew that Gordon kept immaculate care of both his saxophone and his guitars. So, Harvey did not quite understand the reluctancy to accept this gift and be honored to play it.

"Harvey, missing your dad right now?" Donna said half raised and looking at him from their bed. The only light in the room came from the moonlight which dimly shone through the slit in the curtains. It shined a little on Donna illuminating her as a dark form which Harvey could see move.

"Yes. He would have been so proud of our kids," Harvey said pinching the bridge of his nose trying to stem tears from forming.

"Your mom, too. Remember the card Mandy illustrated for our last wedding anniversary?"

Harvey looked at his wife and watched as she turned and put on the lamp sitting on the nightstand.

"I guess I hadn't noticed. I've been so focused on Gordon's sax solos I forgot about Mandy's other talents."

Donna got out of bed and retrieved Mandy's card from her own desk on the other side of the bedroom. Donna's desk was in an alcove they had recently built so she could work at home comfortably; whereas, Harvey had an entire office downstairs. She padded over to where Harvey sat in the plush chair near the closet holding his dad's sax.

"Here. Take a look at that artwork in case you have forgotten you had two wonderfully gifted parents," Donna said smiling to the side as Harvey took the card from her.

The card was manila parchment. The illustrations were in watercolor. The bride and groom were sitting in the center of the seascape painted in blues and greens with white clouds overhead and a tan beach. In calligraphy above the couple in the sky, Mandy had written:

_"To two special people on their anniversary…."_

You then opened the card and a whole crowd of people stood cheering the happy couple on. The people were small compared to the sky and the sea which continued in hues of blues and greens. The ocean itself was brushed with beautiful strokes mixing different shades of blue. The sky was a pale blue, but the sun's lighter tones were widely brushed with strokes of color wherein the rest of the message was written:

_"Two people who still love, respect, and grow together every day in love, our parents, Harvey and Donna Specter:_

_Happy Anniversary. " Love, your children, Amanda, Gordon and MacKenzie._

"We should frame this. It's beautiful work. Mom would have been so proud of her," Harvey said. He handed the card back to his wife who returned to her desk placing the card upright, so it stood proudly on her desktop next to Amanda's junior high school picture.

Harvey, meanwhile, had carefully placed the sax back into its case and instead of returning it to the closet leaned it against the wall next to the chair.

Harvey and Donna got back in bed. Donna turned out the light and turned to her side to face her husband. The rift between Harvey and Gordon had not healed yet, but Donna knew their son well and felt that Gordon would somehow understand how much it would mean to Harvey if he played his grandfather's sax at the concert.

"Donna," Harvey said as he lay with her hand in his. "Did you happen to see any other artwork done by our children which I've missed?"

"What did you think is hanging off the refrigerator for the last twenty years? I can't bring myself to move it. Whenever, I get something out of the refrigerator, I see Kenzie's handprints when she was in preschool; Mandy's first attempt at a Valentine's day card to "mummy and daddy", and I see Gordon's G-clef that he drew extremely well when he was learning theory at the ripe old age of six."

"I guess I'm just a neglectful father. I know that refrigerator art is there and sometimes I get pissed because it sometimes gets in the way when I am hurriedly getting stuff out of the frig. I suppose I will just have to take a better look next time."

"You will. You're just preoccupied with your cases and, especially, with Gordon's apparent abhorrence of Gordon's senior's sax."

"You're even busier. You still run the whole goddamn firm after twelve almost thirteen years and you seem to always have time for the kids."

"I'm Donna, remember. That's my job. I'm COO by day and wife, mother, and total control freak of the rest at night."

"And you're awesome," Harvey said sharing a little chuckle with his wife about how she always described herself. The truth was Harvey always thought she was awesome. She was the most awesome woman in the world, and she loved him and thought the same of him. Still amazing after being married twenty years and worked together for a decade prior to that.

"Thanks, Donna," Harvey smiled as he kissed his wife goodnight.

Donna smiled and kept her hand in his as they slept.

The next day Harvey woke up to a saxophone playing. He immediately sat up in bed.

"Is that Gordon?" Harvey asked Donna who immediately woke up as well when she felt Harvey's sudden movements next to her.

"Look over there," Donna said as she pointed to where the saxophone had been leaning against the wall.

"Do you think he's playing it?"

"I don't know, but there's one way of finding out."

Donna got out of bed and put on her white silk robe over her silk pajamas as Harvey followed her and did the same covering his NY Yankees pajama pants and T-shirt with his blue terry robe.

They ventured quietly down the hall as it was relatively early on Saturday morning and Kenzie was still asleep. She had a softball game later that morning, so she would be up soon.

Harvey and Donna breathlessly looked at one another and thought maybe Gordon's door would be unlocked and they could see which instrument he was playing. Donna quietly motioned for Harvey to try the door.

Harvey gave her a questioning look and then when she nodded and smirked Harvey turned the knob. It opened without a sound. Both parents watched as Gordon was so lost in his playing that he had not heard their entrance. Donna looked around the room and noticed that their son's sax lay next to the open beat up case where Harvey's father's sax had been.

Suddenly the music stopped.

"Hey mom and dad! Did I wake you? I'm sorry," Gordon said turning to look at them.

"Son, are you playing…?" Harvey asked looking around the room.

"Yes, dad, I am. I just switched mouthpieces. Same sax, different mouthpiece," Gordon said coming over to his parents. He had been playing "Moon River" which was his solo for the June jazz band concert.

Harvey walked forward a couple of steps and joined his son on the bed. Donna watched Harvey and then she figured her two men needed some alone time, so she quietly padded out of the bedroom softly closing the door behind her.

"I hope you didn't mind that I came into your room. I saw the case was out, so I thought I would at least look at it," Gordon said brushing his long blonde hair back.

"I'm glad you did. I was looking at it last night and it brought back so many memories. When I was little, your grandma, Marcus and I would sometimes just lay back on the couch and listen to dad rehearse for a couple of hours. Especially before we went to bed. I would beg your Grandma Lily to let me stay up and just listen. Sometimes, when dad was home, mom would paint. If dad had been on the road too long, mom would put one of his records on the stereo and we would dance or mom would paint. I guess I had the best of both worlds as a kid and didn't realize it. I could listen to my dad's sax and watch my mom create such beautiful paintings. She died right before you were a year old. I never got to tell her too much of how great she really was."

Harvey turned his face away from his son to hide the escaping tear. He did not want his son to know how much he was touched that he did come around and tried to play the old sax.

Gordon reached out a hand and placed it on his father's shoulder and said, "Dad, I'm sorry about yesterday. I just think that sometimes you think I'm Grandpop Gordon reincarnated. I'm not. I'm Gordon Jacob Specter. However, I was curious to see the instrument with this fantastic history. Fiona text me yesterday and begged that I at least give it a look. She wanted someone to play it because she felt inept."

"It is a bit beat up, but I assure you it has a great history," Harvey said as he turned back around to face his son.

"Hey, dad, if you love this instrument so much, why did you never get lessons and try?" Gordon asked.

"Oh, no, not me. Your mom and sister have the musical gene in this family. I can't even paint and I tried that, too, when I was a kid," Harvey said smiling. The late spring day was going to be warm. They would have to turn the air conditioning on soon, but for right now there was a gentle breeze blowing the open curtains a little as the sunshine poured in through the slits in the blinds.

"No, I found my talent lie in sports and then arguing like a champ," Harvey said with a chuckle.

"That's why you became a lawyer?"

"Well, not exactly. The law is somewhat like a sports game to me. I like the competition and if you know how to play you can be very successful."

"Now, I know where Mandy gets it from," Gordon laughed returning his father his own Cheshire Cat smile.

"I know she can win an argument like nobody's business…except your mother," Harvey said laughing again.

Suddenly the door busted open again and Gordon's older sister walked in the room.

"Amanda?" Gordon asked into the air. "I thought you were at Samantha's house?"

"I was. I just got back. I crashed at her place. We got caught up in a discussion and we both fell asleep on her couch.

"I can only imagine what my 20-year-old daughter was discussing with Samantha Wheeler. It was a case, wasn't it?"

"Yes, dad, it was. It's all good, though. I won," Mandy said proudly brushing back her long red hair and looking smug.

"Of course, she did," Gordon said.

"Well, Kenzie has a softball game in about an hour, so I would appreciate it if you would both come to it."

"I have never missed any of her games since she started playing. I wouldn't dream of it," Gordon said.

"Don't worry. I already told mom I would be there," Mandy came forward and hugged her dad giving him a kiss on his bristled cheek. She leaned back after she kissed his face.

"You know, mom's right. You really should grow your beard. I like it."

Harvey rolled his eyes.

"You are not winning that argument. That is also the only argument your mother never wins either."

Mandy just laughed and then left the room.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi Folks! Here is my 3rd chapter of my longer reaction to Lily's death. This is getting to be quite a story, so I hope you stick with me on this one. I do understand if you don't, though. Anyhow, let me know R&R. Love to all my followers and favoriters So appreciate your comments. Love - Carebearmaxi**

Mr. and Mrs. Specter: You Will See….I'm Always Here

Chapter 3

About a month later, in the middle of June, Gordon was nearing his solos for the jazz band concert at school. His dad and he had shined up the old saxophone and worked on the keys to make sure it was still in tune. It did not look brand new, but it certainly looked refreshed as if the spirit of Gordon Specter, the grandfather, was renewed.

After this event, Gordon found his mother in the kitchen preparing some hors d'oeuvre for the guests that were coming that night.

"Mom, do you have a minute?" Gordon asked shyly. His mother was the COO of the firm where his father worked and busy all the time, but she had always had time for her family.

"Of course, I do, sweetie, if you don't mind talking to me while I continue to put this little shindig together?" Donna smiled at her son. Sometimes she looked at him and her breath was taken away because he looked so much like her husband. _I have only seen a handful of pictures of Harvey when he was 17, but I swear if he had worn a long blonde wig our son could not look more like him._

Stopping her work at the counter, she stopped her chopping of the cucumbers for the vegetable tray. Placing the slices on the tray then wiping her hands on a towel she had slung over her shoulder, she then looked up at her son.

"Ok, what's up, honey?"

"Well, you know last month when I came into your room and grabbed Grandpa's sax?"

"Of course, I do. We woke up to your beautiful playing. Your father was so happy," Donna said placing a hand on her son's arm.

"Well, I didn't exactly think of doing that on my own. It was just a strange nagging I felt in the middle of the night. I could swear someone was whispering in my ear to take the sax and try it," Gordon said tilting his head to one side.

"Does that sound weird?" Gordon asked after a beat waiting for his mother to respond. She looked at him and she had not exactly smiled but she had not exactly frowned either.

"No, of course not," Donna said. "Do you know who I think it was?"

"You mean someone's spirit or something?"

"Well, could be."

Donna looked at her son and said, "I think it was your grandfather telling you that he wanted to hear you play his sax. I'm sure he knew how much your cousin loathed playing an instrument. However, he knows you love to play. He knows how much your father loved his music. I think it was your grandfather coercing you gently how to make up with your father."

"I know we don't go to church only for a funeral or a wedding, so I am not sure if I believe in all of that spirits, angels, or devils," Gordon said wanting to believe what his mother said.

"I think you have an inner strength and your own deity. You can call it God or Jehovah or whatever. I know you're a good person. I'm not saying that because you are my son. I am saying this because you have good judgment and you are loyal," Donna said smiling.

Gordon smiled and lowering his gaze murmured, "Thanks, mom. I love you."

"I love you, too, honey. Now would you like to help me with those rolls? I need to put those in the oven while I text your father to make sure he brings refills for the liquor cabinet."

"Sure. Is Jamie coming over? She hasn't told me. I thought she may have to babysit."

"No all five Rosses are coming tonight plus Samantha and Alex, Rosalie and their girls."

"What's this little shindig for?" Gordon asked. It sounded like the usual crowd except for the Litts and Aunt Jessica and her family. The Specters have not seen them so much since they moved to Chicago a few years ago after adopting their little guy.

"Nothing. Just wanted to get together with our close friends and have a little fun with them. I invited enough of them with young people so you and MacKenzie won't be bored. Mandy and Richard are coming, too, since she came home this weekend, too."

"I gather Louis and his family are coming?"

"No, he and his wife have a family gathering of their own."

"Oh. I always get a kick out of how dad is always teasing him.'

"Now, Gordon, your father and I love Louis very much. Your father always shows affection for those he truly loves with a lot of teasing."

"Except you?" Gordon asked.

"Oh, no, I just know where to stick it back to your father. He teases me most of all and then I tease him…"

"Until you guys fall on the floor tickling and laughing with each other. Ugh! I wish I hadn't said something now."

Donna laughed at her son's sensibilities. She supposed she felt the same way about her own parents when she was 12. Her father had died only a couple of years later and her mother had not dated again until Donna started working for Harvey at the D.A.'s office. Memories of that "God Awful Dinner Party" still rankled in Donna's brain from time to time.

Donna looked up to ask Gordon if there was anything else bothering him because her maternal instinct told her all was not well with her son. However, it seemed he had placed the rolls in the oven, set the appropriate time on the timer, and then left quietly without a "see ya later, mom".

Donna resumed her preparations waiting for the second shoe to drop.

"So how in the world is Tanner, anyway?" Mike asked as he sat down on the plush couch in front of the fireplace across from Harvey.

"Oh my God! You should see him! He's all gray and he's got a pot belly!" Harvey remarked laughing at the difference in appearance. Travis Tanner one of his and Mike's old rivals had aged much differently than Mike and Harvey. Harvey had kept boxing and jogging mainly because he had had a couple of scares with his heart and did not want to go the way of his father. Harvey still had a lot of living to do. When Harvey looked in the mirror, he saw the differences marking how much time had passed. He looked over at Donna and smiled. He never really saw the differences in her. She always made him aware of them, but he still wanted her above any other woman. She was still passionate, beautiful, and gave him everything. He was so happy they had gotten married and that she had forgiven him long ago for his one transgression many, many years ago.

"Did you beat him again?"

"No, he was honest about it and he won fair and square. Travis is truly a decent man just as he claimed those years ago to you and me."

"You never believed him."

"No, I know was going through a rough time myself back then," Harvey said remembering how hard it had been for him to be separated from Donna. She had decided that they needed some time apart, so she started working for Louis on a permanent basis since Norma's death. That was a few years before she had gotten pregnant with Mackenzie and had tried owning her own business.

"Is everything ok between you and Donna?"

"Yes, of course, why do you ask?" Harvey said frowning. Mike never asked questions pertaining to his and Donna's relationship unless there was a reason.

"Jamie said that Gordon thought his mom was not feeling well. Jamie was here the other day before you got home and Gordon had to catch Donna from not fainting and hitting her head."

"Mike, maybe Jamie is seeing more than was there. I'm sure if she were sick or not feeling well, Donna would tell me."

"Well, Jamie doesn't exaggerate you know that. By the way are you going to give her a ride when you drive Jamie back to school next week for the concert. Jamie's car is in the shop and Rachel and I will be using ours."

"Sure. Too bad Gordon's car is in the shop as well. Of course, I will drive her. I think Mandy is riding with Richard and Mackenzie anyway. I think we're having my niece Fiona stay for a while as well."

"Fiona? She is …" Mike asked

"She's Marcus' oldest. Also, the one that is musical but the last thing she wanted to play was the saxophone."

"Did you tell Uncle Mike that Fiona said take that "f**ing" thing away from me?"

"Mandy!" Mike exclaimed as he kissed his pseudo niece on the cheek and giving her a big hug. Mike shook hands with Richard, Mandy's almost fiancé, and then they all sat down to have a drink.

Harvey had risen to hug his eldest daughter also give Richard a pat on the back. Harvey really liked Richard. He was a good lawyer and was good to his daughter. He hoped they would marry one day. Harvey knew he had asked Mandy last year, but she was not jumping into anything for which she was not ready. _Good girl, Mandy!_

Suddenly a loud noise could be heard coming from the downstairs bathroom. It was so loud it could be heard above the low din of music playing and people laughing and joking.

"Mom!" Kenzie's voice could be heard exclaiming.

Harvey rushed into the bathroom and saw his wife lying on the ground in a heap. She was bleeding from her head and there was blood on the corner of the blue porcelain sink.

"Call 911!"

"Doing it," Mike said and turned away out of the crowd to hear the dispatcher.

"Is she breathing?"

Harvey had immediately kneeled on the cold tile floor of the bathroom and cradled his wife's precious head on his lap. He kissed her forehead and could see how fast his tears of panic had slid to her forehead. He listened for her breath to go in and out and watched for the fall and rise of her chest.

"Yes, but it is really slow!" Harvey called to Mike.

"What happened Kenzie?" Mandy asked her sister.

"I don't know? I was coming in here to get a band-aid and suddenly as I was turning away, I saw mom start to fall to the floor. I tried to catch her, Mandy, I did, but I was too late. Mom must have hit her head on the way down. I'm sorry…" Kenzie started to cry, and the other kids gathered around. Rachel corralled her two youngest and took Kenzie with her.

"Aunt Rachel, I tried…."

"Come on guys. Give everybody room," Rachel said taking her children and Kenzie with her.

"Kenzie, sweetie, you didn't do anything wrong. You're a big girl but not big enough you could have caught your mom. She knows. Shh…" Rachel said cradling the Specters' youngest in her arms as she, too, worried about her best friend.

The ambulance arrived and the EMT's took Donna's vitals and then brought the stretcher in to take her to the hospital.

"What happened?" the confident EMT asked.

Kenzie proceeded to tell them through a veil of tears what happened. Harvey then took her from Rachel and cradled her in his arms. He crouched down to her height and murmured that there was nothing she could have done.

"I love you sweetie. It's ok. Just pray for your mom," Harvey said looking into her dark green eyes. _This must be what Donna looked like when she was 12! Kenzie's face and hair were all Donna. She was musical, acting, and dance talent as well. _

"Mr. Specter," the female EMT said. "We will transport her to the hospital. We think she may have a concussion, but the doctor will know better. All her vitals are stable."

"Can I ride in the ambulance?" Harvey asked.

"Of course, follow me."

Mandy looked for her brother, but she did not see him among the crowd. She had not seen Jamie Ross either.

"Dad, I'll bring the other two just go with mom."

Harvey left without talking to his eldest. He was that worried.

Suddenly, Gordon saw the flashing lights from his room and ran down the stairs followed by Jamie Ross whose long dark hair looked like it was messed from recent activity. Her makeup was mussed, and she was zipping her jeans.

"What happened?" Gordon asked alarmed. His jaw became locked and squared just like Harvey's when he readied for a fight.

"Mom fell and hit her head and she's out cold. Dad went with her in the ambulance. I said I would bring you and Kenzie," Mandy answered haughtily taking in the state of dishabille

"Ok, I'm coming," Gordon said as he watched Jamie sit over with her family.

"Mandy, we'll stay here. Call us as soon as there is news," Rachel said.

"Of course. There's plenty of food if I know mom so if you're welcome to stay and eat," Mandy invited as she, Richard, and the other two Specter children left the house.

When they arrived the hospital, Donna was still out cold. Harvey had held her hand the entire way in the ambulance. He kissed it every once in a while, as he tried to will his wife awake with his words and affection. _It's not like Donna to just faint. I don't think there has every been a moment that I have known her to faint. Even through all three pregnancies, she never once fainted! What happened that she fell and hit her head? Harvey wondered._

All three children and Richard arrived a few minutes behind the ambulance. As the whole Specter family accompanied the EMT's and Harvey into the emergency bay, the EMT shouted her vitals to the ER nurse and placed Donna's face in an oxygen mask and took her vitals again. As soon as the doctor appeared, she began firing questions to Harvey and she could be heard calling Donna by her first name trying to get her to wake.

"Harvey!" Donna called suddenly waking and seeing that she was not at home.

"I'm here," Harvey said rushing back to her side. The doctor and nurses allowed him space. He helped her to sit up carefully because Donna held her head when she rose too fast.

"Why am I here? What happened?"

"It seems you fell and hit your head on the bathroom sink," Harvey said.

Suddenly the three Specter children and one almost son-in-law came into the room.

Kenzie approached her mom.

"I tried to catch you, but I couldn't get to you in time. Are you ok?"

"Thank you, sweetie. There was no way you could have caught me honey. I'm still a bit taller than you. I guess I'm ok. Oooo my head is killing me!" Donna complained.

"We're going to give you a CT scan in a few minutes, so just lie there and make yourself comfortable. You may be here awhile," the doctor said.

"Harvey, we have a bunch of guests at home. I can't stay here!" Donna exclaimed as she tried to jump off the gurney and almost fell again. This time Harvey caught her and carefully placed her back in the gurney.

"Mom don't worry about them. I told them to eat because I know you made gobs of food. I told Aunt Rachel I would call as soon as I had something to report," Mandy said relieved to see her mom conscious and wanting to get back home.

"I'll do it, Mandy. I need to talk to Jamie anyway," Gordon said and left the room.

Donna called to her son, "Gordon, let Mandy… and there he goes."

"Do you remember what happened to you before you passed out, Mrs. Specter?" Dr. Simmons asked watching her patient interact with her family.

Harvey stood next to the gurney with his hand covering Donna's. Kenzie and Mandy also stood in the room and talked every now and again waiting for Donna's answer.

Donna looked at Harvey and suddenly he knew she did not want to answer the question in front of the doctor and the whole family.

"Doctor, could I have a few minutes alone with my wife, please?" Harvey asked.

"Certainly, Mr. Specter. Call the desk if you need anything especially if your wife looks like she may pass out again. We'll be in soon for the CT scan."

"Thank you. Girls, Richard, mom wants to speak to me alone. So, go out and join Gordon, please."

"Sure, daddy," Mandy said kissing Harvey on the cheek.

"Love you, mom!" Mandy and Kenzie said and waved as they left the room followed by Richard who had wished Donna well, too.

"Ok, now that we're alone, what's going on?" Harvey asked stroking Donna's knuckles with his thumb. He had not let go of her hand since regaining it after she tried to leap off the stretcher.

"Harvey, Jamie and Gordon were having sex in his room. I also suspect something else is going on as well."

"Donna! He's 17…Jamie is…" Harvey reasoned. He, at first, did not think anything of it because Gordon was his son. Then it dawned on him how bad the situation could really get.

"I suspect I smelled pot in his room as well. He tried to cover the smell with one of my bath candles, but that scent is unmistakable."

"Donna, it's pot! Both you and I have …"

"Harvey! He is underage. Jamie is underage. She's Mike and Rachel's daughter. You know how strictly she's been brought up!"

"We're not exactly lenient with our children either, Donna."

"Wait," Harvey said before he got sidetracked again by the Jamie and Gordon issue.

"What?"

"How did that happening cause you to fall and hit your head in the bathroom?"

Donna painfully rolled her eyes at her husband because the last thing on her mind was herself and how she wound up at the hospital with a suspected concussion.

"I was looking for his stash. When he was little, and he didn't want me to find something he would hide stuff in the downstairs bathroom medicine cabinet above the sink. He knew that we don't keep the medicines in that cabinet, so he knew that whatever he put in there would be safe because no one usually goes looking for stuff in there."

"So, what were you looking for? His pack of weed or a rolled joint or what?"

"I don't know exactly. I guess I was looking for his weed."

"How would he get weed?" Harvey asked.

Donna screwed her mouth in a half smile. Sometimes her husband, as smart and cunning as he could be, was actually pretty dense.

"He's in high school and plays in not only school band but his own band as well. You don't think he could score weed at any of these events? Harvey, didn't you tell me you got high once when you were 17 and that was the last time until you were of age?"

"Yes, but I was not in the high school band. I was hanging out on the corner with my ne'er do well buddies."

"Ian included in that bunch?"

"Yes, he was come to think of it. My cousin whom I didn't know was that until you discovered it on our honeymoon," Harvey said still incredulous that his wife was the one who pointed out another Specter relative.

"Anyway, I think we ought to talk to him about that and confront him about that and Jamie," Donna said.

"Well, that can keep until later. Right now, you are off to have your CT scan."

The nurse came in to escort her to the CT room. Quickly after the doctor returned to talk with Harvey.

"Did your wife tell you how she hit her head?"

"Yes, she had total recall. She told me that she was looking for something in the medicine cabinet and slipped hitting her head on the way down."

"Ok. Thank you. She won't be long."

Harvey left the bay and went to the waiting room. He counted and all three children were still there. Richard had left to get them some food. He looked at Gordon and thought he looked a little too impatient and preoccupied to want to sit there much longer. What was the word Donna used the other day? Squirmy. Gordon looked squirmy. All six feet of him….squirmy.


	4. Chapter 4

**HI Folks! Here's an update of another family issue with Mr. and Mrs. Specter. Let's see if Harvey and Gordon can work their stuff out. I hope you are liking this one. I wanted to examine what type of father Harvey might be to his son as opposed to his daughters. Don't worry soon the title will make more sense. Please R&R. Thank you for all the followers and favoriters and please leave a review. I would love to hear what you like and may not like. Love-Carebearmaxi.**

Mr. and Mrs. Specter: You Will See…I'm Always Here

Chapter 4

Donna's diagnosis was that she had suffered a mild concussion and the hospital wanted to keep her overnight for observation. So that meant that someone had to drive back to the Specters' house and pick up some clothes for Donna. The only car that was available after Richard had left was Mandy's. She had a small sports car, so she volunteered to go home and get the items which her mom asked of her and bring them back to the hospital leaving Mackenzie and Gordon at home. Mandy would then take her dad home if he wanted to leave by the time she returned. Mandy guessed her father would probably call Ray or a cab to go home or even stay the night. Anytime her mom was in the hospital, her father remained as well. There was at least one time when her parents were in the hospital together from what Mandy could recall. It had happened when Mandy was about six and Gordon 5. Back then Aunt Rachel had come to stay with them until Aunt Julia and Grandma Roberta had returned.

Harvey wanted to stay with Donna until after the kids got back. Gordon wanted to leave immediately after seeing his mom. Donna said nothing but gave Harvey the eye that meant he should try to speak with their son before he hides at band practice or even worse goes over to The Ross' house to be with Jamie. Harvey nodded his question to which Donna nodded "I think now is a good time". These silent looks and knowledge of how the other one was thinking was a foundation of their relationship grown from years of working together and facing crises. Each almost knew what the other was thinking and could transmit that from a look or a nod. Most couples would envy that ability when most spouses cannot even express themselves with words.

"Ok, mom, I'll be back with your stuff," Mandy said kissing her mom's cheek when they had admitted Donna into the room.

"I'll be back for you, dad," Mandy whispered softly as she kissed her other parent on the cheek. Oddly, Harvey reached out and hugged her tightly. When they both released Mandy smiled at her father. She of all the children had felt how much her father's world had crashed when he saw his wife lying on the floor unconscious and seeing the blood smeared on the bathroom sink.

Kenzie was next. She kissed her mom and said good night and then did the same with her father. Again, Harvey hugged his child close to him.

"I love you, pumpkin," Harvey said squeezing her.

"Ok, dad, I love you, too," Kenzie whispered. At 12 ½ she was not quite as understanding as to why her father had suddenly decided to squeeze her so tight. She almost complained again at how she was too old to be called "pumpkin" but with a new mature insight she decided to leave her complaint for another time.

"See you tomorrow, mom," Gordon said. "I'm glad you're ok." Gordon hugged his mom, and Donna stroked his cheek.

"You know you remind me so much of your dad."

"I know mom. You tell me all the time."

"Sorry. I love you son," Donna said with tears in her eyes. She hoped that Harvey would make Gordon understand that the choices he was making right now were not good. Lately Harvey and Gordon had been at odds, so Donna did not want to make things worse. Harvey had volunteered to talk with Gordon without Donna; however, Donna had had misgivings and thought they should approach him together. Harvey reasoned that he made his living by closing situations, so he thought it would be better if he approached the situation with his son as a lawyer and not just his father.

This brief conversation between Harvey and she had been right before the children walked into the room.

_"Harvey, this is not a court case. You can't just blow laws at him and manipulate the situation."_

_ "He's my son. We've butted heads before and been able to come to terms."_

_ "Well, the situations then were a tad different. Normally they were "be careful with your baseball bat" or "don't ride your bike past three blocks." Things when he was a child. This is much more serious. I still say this should wait until I'm out of here."_

_ "No, I think it should be addressed now while it's fresh."_

_ "Ok, what if he doesn't believe you that I saw what I saw."_

_ "Donna, Gordon's not a lawyer yet. He can't claim hearsay."_

_ Donna laughed at that. Harvey had kissed his wife then and smiled. He had been glad she had suffered no real complications from the concussion._

Coming back to the moment, Harvey had waved to her, placed a hand on Gordon's shoulder and they both left the room leaving Donna alone with her nurse who was explaining what the next few hours should hold.

The four of them left the room. Returning briefly to the waiting room down the corridor, Harvey began his inquisition of his son. Mandy and Kenzie followed as they had both left their light jackets in the room when they saw Donna to her room.

"Gordon, do you know why your mother slipped in the bathroom?" Harvey began watching his son resume the seat he had before Donna was taken to her room.

"I don't know. She was standing and slipped off the stool she was standing on. It looks like she had her stilettos on again. I have warned her, dad!...uh… I don't know, dad, why are you asking me?" Gordon said flipping his long blonde hair away from his face. He leaned back on the chair with one arm and became wary and defensive against his father's questions. When you are the son of a famous great New York legal closer, one tended to get defensive Gordon felt.

Gordon did not like what he was sensing from Harvey. Gordon loved his father very much and admired what a great lawyer he was but somehow Gordon knew he was in trouble for something. His dad was giving him the eye. Since the time he was a little boy, his dad giving him the "eye" meant there was something amiss and Harvey Specter was determined to find out what it was and who caused it. Amanda, Gordon's older sister, never really suffered the "eye" and Kenzie, the baby of the family, seemed to be above reprimand. Gordon could not remember when daddy's "pumpkin" was last punished for anything.

_Oh boy! Here he comes!_

"Gordon, we need to talk," Harvey said as he came up on his son slouching on the seat and then quickly changing position.

"Look, dad, I don't know what the problem is, but I didn't hurt mom!" Gordon burst.

"Gordon, I know you didn't hurt mom directly, but she fell because of what she thinks you're hiding."

Mandy waited for her brother to get off his rump and join her and their sister on the trip home, but she looked at her father who eyed her and then back at her brother who didn't respond at all.

"Looks like you two need to talk. I will take Kenzie home and bring back mom's things, ok?"

"Sure. Thank you, Mandy," Harvey said hugging his older daughter again and then hugging his younger daughter for the second time said, "See you at home."

Mackenzie Jessica Specter looked up at her tall father with watery green eyes, "Love you, daddy."

Harvey smiled and whispered as he hugged her, "Love you, too, pumpkin."

Mandy came over to her brother who stood up to his full six foot height. Mandy was about as tall as Donna at 20 years old so the height difference was not bad. Mandy hugged her brother tight and said, "They know. Come clean."

Gordon just gave her a rueful look like. _"We'll see."_

Soon Harvey and Gordon were left alone in the waiting room.

"Hey, your mom needs to rest. So, how's about we get some coffee?" Harvey asked.

"Sure, dad. I'm a little hungry, too."

"I know. No one got to eat before everything happened," Harvey said. "Let's see what they have in the café downstairs."

In the meantime, Donna was alone in her room. Her thoughts were so scrambled. She knew Harvey wanted to confront Gordon about this situation; and it was not that she did not want Harvey to handle it, but she hoped Gordon would just tell the truth. The real problem was if he was going to throw Jamie under the bus. Mike and Rachel's eldest daughter has had it rough when it came to guys, and they were so ecstatic when Jamie and Gordon bonded over the assault trial last year.

_"__**We know she's safe with Gordon," Rachel said. "He won't hurt her physically or otherwise**__."_

_ "__**Of course not, I'm pretty sure my son is in love with your daughter**__," Donna had mentioned to Rachel on one of their "Harriet Specter/Michelle Ross" nights out recently._

_ Now she thought what a mess! Harvey and Mike would definitely lose respective tempers and it would be their right._

Donna thought about her husband and then thought about her son. She remembered how proud Harvey was of all his children. It seemed to Donna, though, that Harvey was the toughest on Gordon. Held him to a different standard. It stemmed she figured from Gordon being their only son.

Donna hunkered down further in the narrow bed and brought the blanket up to her chin. They told her it was fine for her to sleep, but they would probably be in every two hours to ask her questions and make sure she was not suffering any ill effects from the concussion.

_Harvey said he would stop by before he went home for the night Donna thought. _Donna then fell fast asleep.

Harvey and his son ventured into a deserted café. The only other person that inhabited the room was the cashier/cook/cleaner.

"Hey, is the kitchen closed?" Harvey asked looking at the clock which read 7:30 pm.

"No, we're always open. What can I get you?"

"A couple of burgers w/cheese?" Harvey asked his son who nodded his approval.

"Coming right up!" The lone cook excitedly said. "Help yourself to some drinks."

"Thank you, "called Harvey as the cook ventured into the small kitchen

They took seats at the bar. Gordon in true restless fashion began to swivel back and forth in agitation. He felt like he was going to his own execution.

"Son, the reason I wanted to talk with you is that your mother and I were talking," Harvey said looking at Gordon.

Gordon stopped swiveling in his seat and said, "Dad, I'm not doing anything! My grades are good. I've got two solos in jazz band and I've been accepted to Julliard."

That last one took Harvey by surprise. Not that he needed Gordon to be a lawyer, but he had been expecting it.

"That's terrific, son, but we need to talk about your mom," Harvey said. The cook also served as the server as he brought Harvey and Gordon cheeseburgers complete with lettuce, tomato, and onion on top. Harvey poured a tad bit of ketchup on his while Gordon removed the onions of which he was not a fan.

"Pass the ketchup, please, dad," Gordon asked. Harvey looked at his son out of the side of his eyes and smiled. _At least their children had some table manners, Harvey thought._

"Sure," Harvey said doing it.

Gordon squirted a little more ketchup on his burger than his father. Gordon quickly placed the top of the bun on top of his burger and quickly took a huge bite. Gordon was delaying his response to his father's importuning if he could.

"Gordon.."

"Dad, I know what mom may have been looking for. I don't have any. Jamie got it."

Harvey dropped his burger and looked point blank at his son and shook his head. His voice rose in pitch considerably.

"You have got to be shitting me! You got the pot from Jamie? How did she come by it? I'm sure Mike doesn't know or Rachel for that matter. What the hell is going on?"

Gordon looked down at his plate and his long blonde hair covered his face, so Harvey could not see his expression.

"Gordon!" Harvey exclaimed softly.

"Dad, I don't know where Jamie got it. All I know is she asked me if I wanted to try it and that she could score some from her old boyfriend."

"Not the one that beat her. He's in a halfway house!"

"Don't tell Uncle Mike about this! Jamie and I will never be able to see each other again."

"That may be a good thing because that was not all your mother saw."

"Ok. I'm just going to approach this as unemotionally as a lawyer would. Yes, I'm sure mom caught us having sex because Jamie and I love each other. Mandy knows all about it."

"You mean your sister caught you, too?" Harvey asked narrowing his look at his son by squinting with disbelief.

"No, she assumed it and confronted us and we didn't deny it. Mandy had sex at 17 or didn't mom tell you that?"

"Your sister is an adult now and responsible. She has nothing to do with your behavior. You still live at home under my roof."

"You're paying for Mandy's college. She and Richard don't live together yet. So I think she is still dependent on you and mom she just doesn't live at home while she's at school."

"As I said, your sister has no bearing on this case. Because of this we will contact your band director and let him know that you will not be playing in the jazz concert!"

"Dad!" Gordon yelled. It echoed in the near empty café causing the few patrons to turn and look at the father and son sitting at the bar.

"I was going to play Grandpop's sax and I have practiced. I earned the right to play my solos. You can't take them away from me."

"Oh yes, we can! You have to learn that you cannot smoke pot nor continue to have sex with a woman younger than you and…"

"someone who is the daughter of your best friends. I know! Uncle Mike and Aunt Rachel."

"Now, when your sister gets back, you go straight back home and do not leave that house. I will set your younger sister as a tattle if you so much as go near that door!"

While this was happening, Mandy had arrived home with Mackenzie. The only one left in the house was Samantha who was watching the evening news. She rose as Amanda came in the door.

"Hi, girls. I thought I would help Rachel clean up and then everyone decided to leave. Mike and Rachel's little ones were putting up a fuss, so I told them I would stand guard until everyone arrived home. Where's your dad and brother?"

"Dad wanted Gordon to stay. It looked pretty severe from what I could tell," Mandy said with her big brown eyes looking straight into Samantha's.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really," Amanda said. "I have to get mom some clothes for tomorrow since they are keeping her overnight. I have to go back and get Gordon and see if dad wants to come home. He indicated that he may stay the night with mom."

"That's Harvey," Samantha said.

"You realized how much they love each other in the short time you've been here. I can see that," Mandy said.

"Oh, yes. That's for sure. Your mom will be all right. She's in the right place. Your mom is tough."

"It's not my mom that I am worried about."

Samantha was about to leave, but she sensed that the younger woman needed to talk despite her words. Instead, Samantha smoothed her skirt and sat back down on the couch in front of the fireplace in the living room. Kenzie had run upstairs to get ready for school in the morning. She also had dance class the next night and had to prepare for that as well. Miss Annie was a great teacher, but she was a stickler when Nationals came around.

"It's my brother. Mom slipped in the bathroom because she was looking for a pot stash and/or a condom stash for my brother."

"Oh boy, why is that?"

"Because I believe she caught Gordon and Jamie not only having sex, but you couldn't mistake the scent of pot in the enclosed room. They had the window open and the ceiling fan on, but it didn't do much to dissipate the odor."

"I'm sure your father is handling the situation. He's been a father for a while now," Samantha said.

"Yes, but I think he is harder on Gordon than he is on us girls. Gordon feels it and I think dad's going to give him the worst punishment since he still can."

"I wouldn't let it worry you, Amanda. Your dad will talk with your mom and they will figure out what to do together. You just be the big sister, ok?" Samantha said as she patted the younger red-haired woman on the shoulder.

"Thank you, Samantha. I'm glad you were here when I got home."

"Say, how about you stay here with Kenzie. Give me your mom's things and I will run them back and see how bad your brother got berated. Maybe I can sub for your mom, a little bit although those are heels that only she can fill, and talk your father off the ledge?"

"Sounds good. I have class and work tomorrow, so I would appreciate just being able to crash here for a little bit until Gordon or dad get home. Thank you, Samantha," Mandy said rising and give her a hug.

Samantha smiled as she watched Mandy climb the stairs. Samantha loved the Specters and all her firm family as if they were biologically her own, but sometimes Samantha felt she have looked instead of leaping into a situation of which was really not her business.


	5. Chapter 5

HI Folks! I really had a hard time updating this one. I hope you like this chapter. Harvey remembers the day his son was born. Please let me know what you think. I really would like to know. Love - Carebearmaxi

You Will See…I'm Always Here

Chapter 5

While Samantha was driving to the hospital to pick up Harvey and Gordon and bring Donna's things, Mike and Rachel were having an argument with their eldest child. It was the same sort of discussion Harvey was having with Gordon but on the other side of the stick.

"Jamie! Pot!" Mike exclaimed looking at his very pretty, blonde-haired daughter sitting coyly on their living room couch. Mike paced back and forth. He kept punching his fist into his opposite hand. Rachel sat next to their daughter and watched her husband pace. The first thought was that she thought that Gordon was at fault. He was a musician after all and spent a great deal of time away from home. However, she had to believe her daughter when she said how she was able to buy some pot from one of her friends who started dealing. It was almost a moot point, though, because both Mike and she knew that marijuana was being sold for medicinal reasons and would soon be legal for recreational use as well. However, the point was that their daughter was under age and so was Gordon. Gordon would not be 18 until August which was in a couple of months.

"Daddy, I'm sorry. It won't happen again. Gordon was just curious, and I thought no one would know," Jamie explained tearfully.

"It makes me wonder what else you and Gordon were curious about," Mike said.

Jamie hung her head. "I love him, daddy…mom," she said looking up at her father with weepy blue eyes. Rachel stroked her shoulder and looked up at Mike.

"Mike, let Jamie go to her room and rest."

"Yes. We will talk later."

Jamie rose and hugged her father. "I love you daddy."

"I love you, too, honey."

He watched her as she ran up the staircase.

"I'm sure Harvey is talking with Gordon. But we can't do anything until Donna is better and comes home. So please Mike don't say anything to him right now," Rachel pleaded as she rose from her seat on the couch and walked up to her husband.

"No, you're right. I'll leave it," Mike said embracing his wife.

"Harvey, how's Donna?" Samantha asked when she arrived and came to Donna's room.

"She's sleeping. The nurses are keeping an eye on her and have been rousing her every couple of hours. That's what I'm here to do," Harvey answered.

"Where's Gordon? Amanda looked tired when she got home, so I offered to bring Donna's things and take you and Gordon home. That's if you want to go home?"

Harvey half smiled at Samantha and took Donna's bag and placed it near the night stand.

"No, I told the nurses that I was staying until she woke up, but you can take Gordon home. He'll be right back. He went to make a call."

"About Gordon, Harvey, Amanda said that she knew that Gordon and Jamie were smoking pot and having sex."

"She did?" Harvey asked looking at Samantha incredulously. "Why didn't she at least hint at something was wrong?"

"Because she's not a tattle especially on her little brother." Samantha responded. "I think she figured mom and dad would have come up with it first."

Donna moaned and murmured in her sleep. Harvey moved over to the bed and took her hand.

"That's what Donna was trying to find out when she hit her head on the bathroom sink. She knows where Gordon has been hiding things since he was little."

"Well, I'm going to go find Gordon. Tell Donna we love her."

"I will. Thanks, Samantha. Tell Gordon to call me, so I know when he's home."

"Sure thing. 'Night Harvey," Samantha said as she closed the door.

The door closed and Harvey held Donna's hand tighter. He watched as she slept. His mind went back to the day Gordon was born.

_It was a very warm August morning when Donna awoke squeezing Harvey's bicep as they lay in bed._

_ "Harvey, baby's coming," Donna whispered. She did not know the time, but it had to be early in the morning as Amanda was not making her morning noises and calling for mommy to come get her out of bed._

_ "Huh?" Harvey grabbed her hand and felt her squeeze it tightly._

_ "The contractions getting worse?" He asked sleepily._

_ "Yes, Oh...here's another one." Donna managed to voice before she started to gasp in pain._

_ "Let me call Rachel or your sister, which one?"_

_ "Call mom. She's staying with…Julia. They can be here pretty quickly." Donna said. Her voice was going up in pitch as she got hit with another contraction._

_ Donna rose out of bed as best she could, so she could go to the bathroom and at least brush her teeth before she had to go to the hospital._

_ Suddenly Mandy could be heard calling for her mommy._

_ Harvey said, "I'll get Mandy. Call your mom."_

_ Donna stood up and walked to the bathroom and suddenly she heard a pop and a splash as her water broke soaking her pajamas and wetting the floor. Last time this happened she was lying in bed and Harvey thought she had wet herself. Donna had her phone in hand and took it in the bathroom. She called her mother while Harvey visited their daughter who at 16 months old was calling for mommy and daddy now._

_ "Daddy!" Mandy said holding her arms up for Harvey to come pick her up._

_ "Hey baby," Harvey said, "How's my baby girl! Let's get you cleaned up. Mommy going to have your new brother soon."_

_ "Baby?" Mandy asked while Harvey checked her pajamas and her training pants. She a little wet, so Harvey changed her training pants and put new ones on his daughter. Her pajamas were still dry. Harvey felt the crib mattress for damp and was glad to find out that the bed was also dry._

_ "Good girl, Mandy. All dry!"_

_ Mandy raised her arms and set "All dry!" _

_ "Give daddy a kiss," Harvey said. They had been teaching Mandy how to kiss and she was still sloppy at it, but Harvey would not trade those sloppy baby kisses for anything in the world._

_ Mandy squished Harvey's cheeks in her hands and push her face into his putingt her lips to his._

_ "Ah!" Harvey laughed and Mandy smiled too slapping Harvey's cheeks affectionately._

_ "HARVEY!"_

_ He did not need to hear Donna's agonized voice through the baby monitor. He could hear her echo through the room._

_ "Breathe, Donna! I'll be right there," Harvey called. He knew she was in a lot of pain. This pregnancy was much easier than when Donna was expecting Amanda. No complications and this baby was definitely not premature. Donna's belly was the only thing that got large. She looked like she was carrying a large beach ball. However, Harvey thought her the most beautiful woman in the world and even late into her pregnancy Harvey could not keep his hands off her._

_ Harvey picked up Mandy and carried her out to her mother. _

_ "There's my baby girl," Donna said kissing Amanda while Harvey held her down._

_ "Let her walk around, Harvey. She's fine."_

_ "Of course," Harvey put her down and immediately Amanda wandered off to her nursery where her toys were. They both watched as she toddled off. She found the noisiest toy she could which was her squeaky clown. She found all kinds of ways to make it make noise._

_ Donna made a face and sucked in a deep breath._

_ "Another one?"_

_ "Yes," Donna said gritting her teeth. Donna had managed to throw on some clothes while she waited for her mother and sister to arrive._

Harvey brushed the red locks away from his wife's head and kissed her there in her sleep. She did not move, and Harvey began to worry. His mind then wandered back to the day his son was born.

_"Ok, breathe," Harvey coached. He breathed with her more in sympathy than really knowing what to do._

_ "Harvey my back hurts so much," Donna complained. She was sitting up against a pillow._

_ Just then Roberta and Julia came in the bedroom. _

_ "Oh, honey," Roberta said as she came over to Donna and kissed her on the forehead._

_ "Harvey, where's Amanda?" Julia asked._

_ "She's in the nursery."_

_ "Ok, I'm going to take her in the other room and then she can say goodbye when you're ready to go."_

_ "Mom! My back hurts so bad!"_

_ "Carol told me that is probably back labor. I gather you didn't have it last time?"_

_ "I didn't have…(sucks in a breath as a contraction hits)…much of anything last time," Donna managed to say._

_ Roberta took Harvey who seemed paralyzed from the doorway and brought him to his wife._

_ "Ok, Harvey, swing her feet around and get her into a standing position."_

_ Harvey's eyes were focused on his wife. Although this was the second child for them, this was completely different. He swung Donna's feet to the floor and then listened for the next instruction._

_ "Donna put your arms around Harvey's neck and then Harvey just let her hang off you, but hold her waist so she doesn't fall."_

_ "Got it!"_

_ Harvey did as he was told, and Donna breathed a grateful moan._

_ "Oh! That's so much better!" _

_ By taking the weight off her feet and her back, the pain eased._

_ "How about the bath?"_

_ "I am supposed to get in the tub at the hospital."_

_ "Are you ok to leave now?" Harvey asked. His eyes never leaving her face. He could almost kick himself when he knows he was to blame for bringing her to this._

_ "Harvey, stop blaming yourself," Donna said through her pain. She knew that look. She had seen it enough through the years when he was feeling guilty._

_ "We made this baby. I'm just as much to blame as you. As a matter of fact, I think more," Donna took a moment to give Harvey the sexiest stare. Harvey smiled. _

_ "Are you coming on to me and you're in labor?" Harvey rolled his eyes and then he kissed her. "You are amazing!" _

_ "Well, my answer is going to have to wait," Donna gasped and held onto Harvey as another contraction hit._

_ "Can we get going?" Donna said looking up at him._

_ "Of course," Harvey said. They quickly kissed Amanda goodbye and told Julia and Roberta they would call when the baby was born._

...Suddenly Harvey's cell beeped, he took it out of his suit jacket and saw that Gordon had called as he had asked Samantha to tell him to.

"Hi Dad," Gordon said sullenly. "Is mom still asleep?"

"She's moved a time or two, but yes, she is. I have to get her up soon to test her."

"Ok. Look, dad, I'm sorry about everything. I talked to Jamie and Uncle Mike found about the pot, I'm not sure about the other."

Harvey stood up and walked to the other side of Donna's room so as not to disturb her while he talked to their son.

"We need to sit down and talk about this. I'm sure Uncle Mike just about hit the roof."

Harvey heard Gordon sigh.

"Are you still going to prevent me from playing my solos?"

"We'll revisit that when your mom wakes up."

"Ok, dad. Tell mom, I'm sorry. Tell her I love her," Gordon said.

"I will. I love you Gordon. Don't forget that."

"I won't. Thanks, dad," Gordon said sounding a little more relieved that his father may reconsider him playing his solos.

Harvey hung up because Donna talked in her sleep.

Harvey removed his jacket and looked in the bag for his pajamas that he had told Amanda to pack as she instinctively knew that her father would stay the night with her mother.

As he changed, Harvey's mind went back again to the night Gordon was born.

_At the hospital, Donna was dilated 6 centimeters already, so they should not have too long to wait. It was 12:30 pm. Donna had been in labor now for about six hours. She had had an epidural, but the doctors were afraid that if her labor did not move along soon it would wear off before she was dilated enough to push._

_ "Let's try the tub, Donna," the nurse said as she and Harvey each took an arm. _

_ "I can't really feel my feet," Donna said. Then a contraction hit, and Donna had to hold off until it passed._

_ "Ok. Let's try the ball instead. I'll have your husband hold you on there in case you roll too far."_

_ "No! I don't want the ball. If you just get me some warm compresses for my back which is still killing me, I would appreciate it!"_

_ Harvey and Dottie, her nurse, put her back in bed. The minute she got a warm compress on her back things started happening. Harvey remembered that Donna's labor started to accelerate and suddenly he remembered she started pushing. For one minute she faltered and cried, "Harvey, I can't do this anymore."_

_ By this point, Harvey knew she had been in labor for almost 9 hours and she had started pushing two hours ago making it 11 hours of labor._

_ "Come on, Donna! You can do this!" Harvey coached._

_ Finally, at the twelfth hour, Donna pushed and there was a great release and a new life had cried himself into the world._

_ "Donna, he's beautiful!" Harvey said with wonder as he held his newborn son in his arms minutes after he was born. The doctor had first placed the baby on Donna's chest. She was so happy that Harvey wiped tears from her eyes and kissed her. The nurses helped wipe the thick vernix off him._

_ "Gordon, sweetie, momma loves you" Donna said out of the release of nerves. _

_ "How about daddy takes him over to the warming table so we can get his vitals," Dottie said. _

_ Harvey picked up the baby from Donna and had to wipe away his own eyes. This was his son. _

_ Donna remarked before more pain took over as she expelled the placenta. "Harvey, he looks just like you. No doubt about whose son he is." Harvey looked back before laying the baby on the table and Donna's smile was wide and proud._

...Harvey wiped the tears out of his eyes as he stood in Donna's room now for reasons other than happy ones concerning his son. He pulled his T-shirt over his head and went over to gently wake his wife to be sure she was still here.

"Donna, wake up."

She did not answer and just lay there breathing.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi Folks! I hope you haven't given up on this one. It's taking me a bit because I've been doing other things for the holidays. However, I just wanted to follow up on this. I have taken a bit of liberty with the supernatural on this one but I think Harvey and his son really need it. I hope you enjoy this and please keep R&R'ing. It does let me know you still care. Thank you all Love- Carebearmaxi.**

You'll See….I'm Always Here

Chapter 6

"Donna, please wake up. I need to talk to you. I need your help with Gordon. You have always known how to handle the kids all by yourself," Harvey said as he bent forward and kissed Donna's cool forehead. His hand found her hand. He kissed it and held it tightly.

"Harvey?"

"Donna?" Harvey said as he looked to see if it was her voice that had called his name. He realized he still was holding her hand and her eyes were closed and she was still fast asleep.

"Harvey."

He looked around and there was his mom. She put a hand on his shoulder, and it felt so real and comforting. Never releasing his wife's hand, he grasped his mother's hand with his other.

With noticeable tears in his eyes, he said, "Mom. I'm so glad to see you. I screwed up big time with my son. Donna suffered a concussion indirectly because of Gordon's actions and now I am pretty sure he thinks that I blame him."

"Well, we're not perfect. I explained that to you so many times. Do you blame Gordon for Donna's condition?"

"To tell the truth, yes, she was looking for his stash when she fell and hit her head."

"You know I did get to know Donna a little bit before I left. She is a good mother. That's what mothers do. She wanted to confront Gordon herself. So, you can blame Gordon all you want because he is indirectly involved, but, son, it was Donna's choice to look for Gordon's stuff. Donna would be the first one to tell you that. She was being a mother. She felt her child was in trouble and she wanted to make sure that she had evidence, so she did not accuse him falsely. Isn't that why you got so mad at the fact that he was smoking pot and having sex with his girlfriend? Personally, I think you and Donna are wonderful parents.

"Really?" Harvey looked up at her. Again, he was amazed at how she looked. Lily was young and beautiful. She was also alone this time. Last vision she was with his father. Harvey wondered why, and then he did not because he was just grateful she was there to help him. He did miss her so much.

"Son, Gordon is looking for your approval. He feels you're a little too hard on him. Harder than you are on his sisters. Yes, he admitted he screwed up and made a bad choice. He loves Jamie Ross and they want to be together."

"Mom, he's 17. I know I was a screw up at 17. If it weren't for Jessica, I probably would have wound up a drug dealer or worse," Harvey said with feeling.

"Harvey you were not a screw up. You always looked after your father and brother when I was not welcome, and, Harvey, I don't need to tell you what to do. You and Donna have been parents a long time now and they are beautiful, gifted children. Donna will be fine. Then you can both confront Gordon and Jamie. Remember Gordon says he loves her. Even if it might be puppy love you can't deny those feelings. That you should know."

"Mom, there are plenty of times I regret not making up with you before you died. I never knew how much I really missed you," Harvey said as he looked up into his mom's youngish vital face. He felt her touch his cheek and then she was gone.

Harvey lowered his head and at the sound of Donna's voice, he raised it and looked into her sleepy hazel eyes. Those eyes and the face of the person was one of the most precious beings in his life and the thought of being without her, in any capacity, burned a hole in Harvey's heart.

"It happened again, didn't it?" Donna said smiling and squeezing Harvey's hand in reply.

"What?" Harvey said softly smiling at her incredulously that she would know.

"Your mother appeared to you this time, didn't she?"

"How did you know that?" Harvey said tilting his head and squinting in disbelief amazed by his wife's uncanny ability to read him.

"Because, Harvey, you have a light to your face. You look almost ethereal. It usually happens at the most critical moments. Your mom knows even from the spirit world when you need her."

"How's your head?" Harvey asked as he stroked Donna's knuckles with his thumb.

"It's hurts like a mother…." Donna started to say the mother of curse words. She decided in light of Harvey's spiritual visit that she change the simile.

"It's hurts like I got hit by a freight train. This bandage is itchy, too!" Donna eased a fingernail underneath the gauze and began to scratch.

"Did they cut my hair?" Donna exclaimed.

"Just a little. They had to put a pressure bandage on it because you were bleeding," Harvey reasoned with her.

She bent forward and then laid back. She put her hand to her head again and moaned.

"I bet that hurt. The nurse will be here in a minute. Samantha brought the bag with your things, and she took Gordon home. He got home. He texted me and then I had Kenzie text me to confirm."

"Doesn't mean he's not going to sneak and see Jamie. Have you talked with Mike or Rachel yet?"

"Yes, but just to tell them the kids can't see each other until you are out of the hospital and we can all sit down and hash this out. Also, I don't have the guts until you're with me," Harvey said with a smile. He stood up and bending over Donna's prone form kissed her forehead on the itchy bandage and smoothed her hair back. He was rewarded with a sleepy smile. He couldn't help then to kiss her. She placed her hand on his cheek and then on his shoulder.

"We're going to be just fine, Harvey Specter," Donna said looking up at his adored face and stroked his newly whiskered cheek. "I'm going to ask you again. Please keep this. Please don't shave it off in the morning."

She continued to stroke his whiskered cheek. The she let her hand stroke his hair which he wore a bit longer than in his youth. It was a bit grayer and pleasurably soft between her fingers. She noticed he was wearing his glasses. Wow! He never wore his thick black framed glasses in public. He always sneaked his contacts out of his desk and put them in before facing a client.

Donna, herself, gave up the fight of not wearing glasses when she needed them. They were a chic fashion item anymore and nothing to be ashamed of. She did take them off when interviewing candidates or when she entertained. Otherwise, they were almost a permanent fixture perched on her face.

"I must rate," Donna said as she tugged on the frames of his glasses.

"Oh, I forgot to take them off before the guests came. I was talking to Mike and he gets a kick out of seeing me wear glasses. He likes to tease me and call me "old man".

"Well, Mike wears glasses, too. Did you know that?" Donna asked as she smiled. They spoke in hushed tones as was the quietness of the room and the fact that Donna was still a little groggy from being roused every couple of hours. Very few times, now, did they get to discuss their friends. Too much happening in the day to day. However, as the children grew older, their alone time began to increase and sometimes their conversation went back to the good old days when they were in the D.A's office making observations about others and then laughing about whether their conjectures were true. Then a little flirting as always. They would not be Harvey and Donna without that.

Their sex life was still passionate. Not as frequent but just as intense when it happened. They truly loved one another and always had.

"Mike wears glass?" Since when?" Harvey asked amused.

"Since Rachel bought hers about three years ago. When she had to take Robbie and Donna Marie to the eye doctor. Rachel had a checkup and last but not least was Mike. Rachel said he put up such a fuss."

Harvey smiled and then said, "Well that is duly noted for future reference, Mrs. Specter."

"Do you think they are going to let me out of here soon?"

"I don't know. We'll know more when they run the concussion protocol before you leave."

"Oh? Isn't that what they do to athletes when they think they have suffered a concussion during a game?"

"Yes, but I hear they are going to perform on you because you, my dear, need it." Harvey rose and pulled the covers over Donna as the nurse came in.

"Well, this is good! I see you're up and very awake. Everything still feel it's in the right place?" The dark haired small framed nurse asked.

Donna nodded and then held her head because it hurt to move it.

"You have a headache?"

"Yes. The size of Montana," Donna responded.

"Well that should go away after a little bit. You can go back to sleep if you want. We will rouse you in a couple of hours to test you again."

"Thank you," Donna said. She took Harvey's hand in hers and squeezed. "I gather you're staying here the night?"

"Just try to stop me," Harvey said.

"Good," was all Donna need say. All other feelings were conveyed in her eyes and smile and the way she kissed Harvey's hand.

"You are welcome." Harvey said and kissed her hand in return.

When Samantha was driving Gordon home from the hospital, he sat in the passenger seat watching the world fly by the window. He wore his seat belt while his unbound long blonde hair blew in the breeze from the half-opened window.

"Look, Gordon, I don't know you as well as I know your older sister, but you seem to be a good kid. Your parents, I've known for a little bit. You are lucky to have such great parents."

"Yeah, sure," Gordon said turning closer to the window. If Samantha had been able to look at his face, she would have sworn he had a "Harvey" look to him. Dark brown eyes boring into mid-air and stern purse to his lips. This look always meant that Harvey did not care to really listen and was just putting up with the company out of necessity.

Gordon lowered his head and focused on his thumbs. He had calluses from playing guitar and sax but compared to all his other activities including listening to his father pontificate on the evils of underage sex and marijuana the calluses were less painful than they once were.

"Dad is a hypocrite, and mom is just as bad. If he differs from her opinion, he'll go along with her," Gordon said bluntly. All he wanted to do was to be with Jamie Ross right now. He could ask if Samantha would drop him at he and Jamie's secret meeting place, but he knew better than to ask Samantha to do that because then he would need her to swear she would not tell his parents that he was not home. No, Samantha may keep Mandy's secrets, so he doubted that she would do the same for him as he still lived under his parents' roof.

"It's called parenting. It's called having an united front," Samantha said. "Look when I adopted my son a few years ago, he was twelve and going down a bad path. I've been there and, if it had not been for my foster mom and a little therapy, I never would have come out on the other side whole. A stint in the military didn't hurt either I might add. Anyway, I put my son on strict rules and kept a watchful eye on him, and you know what happened?"

"What? He became the epitome of virtue? Kyle is the same age I am. I don't think he'll win any awards for supreme human being and if you think that you're a worse parent than my father!"

Samantha was determined not to be rattled. She always thought that Gordon was the compliant one of the three Specter children. Amanda was certainly Harvey's daughter. She was arrogant and sweet all at the same time and could argue like no one's business. She had also inherited his method of negotiation. Kenzie was all Donna. Everyone could see she was almost omniscient like Donna and knew how to solve problems even at the ripe old age of 12. Gordon, though, such an enigma now. Maybe it was because he was a teenager. Samantha had had enough arguments with her own son. Gordon was right. Kyle is a work in progress.

"Gordon, give your mom and dad a break. Try to understand where they are coming from. They aren't perfect, and I know for sure they don't always do the right thing. They love you and they love Jamie so they want to make sure that you guys don't go too far and can't turn back. Especially before you're ready."

They had arrived at the Specters' house and Kenzie met them at the door. She came up to Samantha's white Lexus and stood on the curb with her phone in her hand.

"Daddy called to see if you were home yet. You better text him because you don't want to make him even more angry with you."

Gordon got out of Samantha's car. He remembered to thank her and then with a hand on his little sister's shoulder went into the house while he texted his father with his other hand.

Meanwhile, Jamie Ross had come downstairs of her house and eyed her parents doing some homework with her twin siblings.

Jamie's long blonde hair was starting to go dark at her roots. In truth Jamie was as dark haired as her mother but had the bright blue eyes of her father in a round face with a peach complexion. Petite and small in stature, she was a complete combination of both Mike and Rachel.

"Mom, Dad?" Jamie ventured.

They looked up at her when she called them.

"Yes, honey, what is it?" Rachel said. She remained hovered over Robbie's science workbook helping him with his questions while Mike hovered over Donna Marie's shoulder helping her with her math homework.

"Can I go see Jamie?"

Rachel tossed her long dark hair back. Harvey had called to say Donna was doing better; but he was not sure when they would release her, so he was staying the night. He made it implicitly clear that Jamie and Gordon cannot see each other while Donna was in the hospital. Mike and Rachel agreed wholeheartedly and thought that they should all be together to handle the situation.

"No, Jamie," Mike said. "When Aunt Donna is out of the hospital and they are both home we will all meet together and get to the bottom of this and come to an understanding."

"That means that you can text or call Gordon, but you cannot go to him nor will he be allowed to see you right now. You must understand, Jamie, that this is the way it has to be for right now," Rachel trailed Mike's words.

"It's not fair, mom and dad! You don't understand!" Jamie started to cry and whine and then stomped her way back upstairs. Rachel and Mike just looked at each other and then pulled their focus back to their two youngest sitting at the dining room table with their homework.

Robbie and Donna Marie looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders thinking their older sister had gone off her rocker. Being only 9 years old, their world revolved around their homework and their parents and when they would be allowed to watch T.V. or play their video games again.

Robbie looked up at his mother and pushed up his glasses. "Mom, can we get back to this? I want to watch T.V. sometime today."

Rachel placed some dark hair behind her ear and smiling said, "Of course, honey. Now Jupiter…"

Donna Marie looked up at her dad and said, "Daddy, are you going to lock Jamie in her room?"

Mike smiled and blew out a breath, "No, of course not. However, that doesn't sound like a bad idea."

Gordon sat in his room. He went there after he entered the house with Kenzie. Jamie had texted him and said she was going to ask her father if she could come see him. However, Gordon just received the text that she was not allowed to see him until the two of them could sit down with their respective parents and talk out all this misunderstanding.

Gordon looked out his second-floor window. The large oak tree stood adjacent to his window. He was sizing the jump to the branch next to him. When he was little, Gordon had attempted to climb out of his window sneaking out of the house because he did not want to serve his punishment for fighting with his sister. However, Gordon slipped halfway down and fell out of the tree. He was only eight and had only sprained his ankle and arm. He could not practice his sax for a week and he unable to pitch a baseball that week. However, it was nice having mom read to him, help him finish his homework or sit and watch one of his favorite shows with her. Donna did not like to see her son so inactive and knew that he had felt twice as bad now, but she showered him with just their time: no Mandy, no Kenzie (she was just two), and no Dad.

Gordon fell asleep on his bed while he waited for word on his mom's condition. Dad had not called again since he had talked to him before Gordon left the hospital with Samantha. The stars were out when Gordon finally realized nothing was going to be accomplished tonight. Amanda had said she was willing to fix him a plate if he were hungry. Gordon was not hungry although he had barely finished the burger he had shared with his dad earlier in the evening. Anyhow, there had been plenty of food left from the non-party that took place.

His appetite was not for food, though. He just wanted to know if his mom and dad were going to exhort their powers over him by really contacting his band director and making sure he would not play in his final concert as a senior in high school. Gordon had gained acceptances from three colleges and one of them was Harvard. Just like Mandy. He did not want to be a lawyer. He wanted to be a musician or worse a music engineer. However, he did not want to disappoint his dad who seemed to have his heart set on his only son becoming a Harvard educated lawyer like himself and his eldest daughter. Gordon had overheard one of his parents' flirty conversations one time. Probably when she was pregnant with his sister that his dad wanted either a firm full of namesake lawyers or a Specter team of baseball players, boys or girls, he did not care which. Gordon had not known exactly what his dad was talking about back then but now he did, and he rolled his eyes. His dad's ego sometimes showed no bounds.

Suddenly, Gordon heard a voice talking to him.

"You know Gordon. Your dad only wants the best for you," the disembodied voice said in Gordon's ear. Gordon had heard that voice before. It had been the same one that had told him to steal into his parents' room and grab his grandfather's sax.

Gordon groggily woke up and looked at himself. He realized he was still in his clothes. He looked around but saw nothing or no one speaking with him. He decided to try speaking with the spirit instead. Maybe this would elicit a reply.

"Are you my Grandfather, Gordon Specter?" Gordon asked to the air. A reply did not immediately happen, so Gordon thought maybe he was just going stir crazy.

Gordon lay back down and then he definitely heard someone in his room.

"I told you Kenzie. Stay out…." Gordon popped his up and saw an older man who looked sort of scruffy with brushed back dark hair and whiskers.

"Who are you?" Gordon asked.

"I'm your grandfather. I'm Gordon Specter. Well, I was before I was transported to the afterlife," he said.

"I thought ghosts were all shimmering and didn't have a shape. You look like I could reach out and touch you."

"You can touch me. I'm solid for right now, but as soon as I am done saying my spiel I need to go back. The supreme being just lent me my old form right now, so I could introduce myself."

"You mean God?" Gordon asked.

"Yeah, sure, whatever name you would like to give him as long as its respectable. He mentioned I need to have a word with your dad about that," Spirit Gordon smiled his weary smile.

"Oh? So, can I hug you?"

"Yes, your dad has. Sure." Gordon Sr. held out his arms and young Gordon stepped into his embrace.

"Grandpa, I am so glad you're here. Maybe you can help me convince dad to lay off me. He wants me to be perfect, but I can't be that. I know I got in trouble with Jamie; but I love her, and she really didn't want to give me the pot…"

"Oh, slow down there, hot shot. It's ok," Gordon Sr. said as he held his grandson tightly. He stroked the long blonde hair.

Gordon Jr. clung to his grandfather and wondered why he was seeing him. He did not wonder too long before Gordon Sr. sat him down on the bed.

"Now I know all about what happened. Your grandmother informed me."

"Look, I just don't think it's fair if I'm banned from playing. I earned that right. They can take something else away. Not that!"

"You know, Gordon. Your dad just loves you so much and he loves that you play the sax like I did. I must admit. I think you're better than I ever was," said Gordon and play punched young Gordon's bicep.

Gordon smiled his full smile. "No, grandpa. I've heard your records. You were "True North," man. I could never be that good. I felt something when you played. I'm not sure if I am feeling anything when I play."

"You're wrong. Your dad doesn't need you to be perfect. Lord knows he's the first one to tell you he's not, but he needs you to understand that you should think about things before leaping down a path that you may not be prepared. Your dad knows you love Jamie, but he's had enough experience about having his heart broken and especially the other way around. Jamie is the daughter of his best friend. He doesn't want things to be complicated before you two can handle it. As for the other, your dad's been around. Don't think he hasn't. He spent enough time in the some of the dives I played in to know and to have experienced firsthand. Besides your dad isn't perfect. He realizes you're a kid and still need to grow, but your mom and your dad do not want you to go down a path without knowing the obstacles which could hurt you. That's all."

"Why couldn't he say that himself? He's a god-" Gordon change his expletive at Spirit Gordon's admonishing finger. "He's a freakin' lawyer. He lives for the argument and for him to always be right!"

"He usually can shut himself off when it's someone close to him, but you are his son. He is so proud of you and he doesn't want to seem less perfect in your eyes. That's why he needs to talk with your mom regarding this."

"I know they always work together and are united in serious stuff no matter what. You should have been here when Mandy was missing last year."

"What makes you think I didn't know?"

"Oh, yeah, well.." young Gordon said with a little smirk looking a lot like Harvey as a teenager.

"Hey, let me hear you play. I know you're playing "Moon River" for one of your solos. I used to love playing that one myself. It's a great melody. Let me hear it," Spirit Gordon requested.

"It's too late. I'll wake up my sisters," Gordon, Jr. protested.

"No, you won't. I think they are both used to it."

Gordon retrieved his saxophone or correction his grandfather's saxophone and adjusting his mouthpiece, tested it, began to play Moon River.

"That is beautiful, man," Gordon Sr. said softly closing his eyes and allowing the melody to wash over him. Spirit Gordon loved the music of where he was presently, but he missed the tones of his alto sax. There was not too much jazz where Gordon Sr.'s soul resided. He was proud of Harvey's only son. Gordon's namesake was a true musician. One who allowed himself to come through the music.

When young Gordon had finished, he looked around and Spirit Gordon had vanished.

"Grandpa?" He asked to thin air. He did not feel so bad, though, at the thought of Grandpa Gordon's leaving. Harvey's son had felt a peace wash over him, and he was encouraged by his grandfather's supernatural visit. Gordon went across the room and put his sax back on its stand next to his guitars. Suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"Gord?"

"Kenzie? I thought you were asleep," he responded to his 12-year-old sister.

"I was but I heard you playing. Were you talking to someone?"

Gordon opened the door and saw his younger red-haired sister standing there in her pink nightshirt with the big G clef and ballet pointe shoe printed on it. Their mother had had made nightclothes for them a few years ago for Christmas. Kenzie apparently still wore hers. Gordon's pajamas from that Christmas had a saxophone on the t-shirt portion and the bottoms had Bb's printed on them. Amanda's had a fountain pen on her nightshirt as she was an aspiring writer before focusing on the law.

"Yes, but you wouldn't even believe it if I told you," Gordon said softly standing in the doorway of his bedroom. "By the way, what time is it?"

"It's after midnight. Dad texted me. He wanted me to tell you that mom is good. Her head hurts, but she seems to be ok. She may come home tomorrow."

"Ok, thanks for the update. Is Mandy in her room?"

"No, she fell asleep watching TV. I turned the TV off, so she will probably be back up soon."

Kenzie yawned. "I'm going back to bed. By the way, if you see Grandpa again, tell him Kenzie misses him."

Surprised, Gordon did not know whether Kenzie had been joking with him because he thought that his vision of their grandfather was his alone, but he found himself assuring her, if he did see him again, he would be sure to mention it.


	7. Chapter 7

**Happy New Year, Folks! I am trying to end this particular fic in a cool way. This is the next to the last chapter I believe. I hope you are enjoying this. I know it may seem hokey, but I think Harvey and his children needs this. Please R & R. Love - Carebearmaxi.**

You'll See…I'm Always Here

Chapter 7

Donna came home from the hospital the next afternoon. In the meantime, Harvey had gone home, showered, and changed. He made a stop into Gordon's room to talk with him before traveling to the hospital to pick up his mother.

"Gordon?" Harvey said as he knocked on Gordon's bedroom door. "Gordon!"

Gordon Specter opened his bedroom door with such force that his long blonde hair swung back in the air between he and his father.

"What!?"

"I just wanted to let you know that I am picking up your mom and then tomorrow night we can talk to the Ross' and straighten this whole mess out between you two."

"Dad, you know we don't need your help!" Gordon was still angry although he had listened to everything his grandfather had said to him. Gordon slammed his bedroom door in his father's face.

Harvey ground his teeth and opened the door of his son's bedroom.

"Look, Gordon, I have had about enough of this attitude. Now, you should know I did not call your band director, so as of now, you are still playing your solos a week from now. I think what is needed here is a big talk between Jamie's parents, Jamie, your mother and me, and you. I think your knowledge of situations that you cannot handle needs to be refreshed."

Gordon just sat at his desk and looked out the window. Once in a while he would look up to his father. When Harvey was finished, he turned to leave. Gordon suddenly stood up.

"Dad! I am sorry I hurt mom. Jamie and I are grownups! We don't need your lecture."

Harvey turned around and moved his head back and forth and left the room

Later that day, Donna returned home with a small bandage over the open wound which had required a stitch or two. Her head was still a little sore, but she was much better than the previous night. Both Amanda and Kenzie greeted her as the car pulled up in the driveway. Mandy took her mother's bag and carried it into the house.

"Mom, how are you feeling? You look good," Mandy said.

"Mom always looks good, Mandy," Kenzie said.

"Thank you girls," Donna said giving them both huge hugs and rubbing their backs. "I'm so glad to be home."

Harvey came around the side of the car putting his keys in the pocket of his black trench coat. The sky was threatening with a late afternoon shower. As Harvey came around the car to hug his daughters, he looked up and thought what a great and bleak day this was going to be in light of the situation that needed to be done.

"Where's your brother?" Harvey asked his girls.

"I don't know. I haven't seen him all day," Mandy said.

"I think he might still be at school," Kenzie said. "I came home with a friend because he said he couldn't pick me up.

"He should be at school, Harvey. It's Tuesday. He has concert band practice," Donna said. "I might have hurt my head, but I know all your schedules."

"Well, I'm calling him.."

Suddenly, the Ross' pulled up and Mike jumped out of his car.

"Donna, Harvey, the kids ran away. Jamie left us a note!"

Mike had the note in his hand. He closed the door of the car and ran toward Harvey and Donna and the girls as Rachel got out of the other side of the car followed closely by her twins.

Mike handed Harvey the note which was written in Gordon's hand.

_Dear Mom and Dad_

_Jamie and I are ok. We decided to leave for a little while until this blows over. We know we made a bad choice, but we don't feel that punishing us will make us learn any lessons. We feel we made a decision for us just like you and mom make decisions every day._

_I have taken some money from my account and the credit card that you gave us permission to use in an emergency. Jamie has done the same from her parents and has left her own personal note for them._

_Please don't try to find us. We have both left our cell phones at home._

_Don't worry about us. Please let some time pass and we will return._

_Mom, I'm sorry I hurt you. Dad, I'm sorry I'm not who you think I am._

_Love to Mandy and Kenzie the best sisters in the world._

_See you soon_

_Love_

_Gordon_

Harvey looked at his wife as he showed her their son's note. Her pallor had suddenly gone back to very pale. She never had a lot of color possessing ivory skin but now her eyes becoming dark with concern.

"Oh Gordon! What an idiot!" Mandy exclaimed. "Does he really think he's going to prove he is an adult by acting this way?"

"Let's go into the house," Harvey said ominously.

Meanwhile in a hotel room around the corner from their high school, Gordon Specter and Jamie Ross were sharing an early dinner from T.G.I. Friday's takeout.

Jamie picked at her Chicken Marsala and raised her head to look at her boyfriend. She was feeling uneasy because she knew that her parents would be terribly worried. It really bothered her because she felt responsible for dragging Gordon into this whole situation. He really was almost an innocent. He was naïve; he was not innocent. One who was aware of what the seedier life could be but never actually sought it. Jamie possessed a much freer spirit and many times did not look before she leaped. Her parents were always trying to lend her some wisdom when it came to her extracurricular activities and never for a moment did not throw up in her face the problems she had with her mentally unstable boyfriend she had had the previous year. If it had not been for Uncle Harvey, she would have probably become a recluse. No, Gordon just wanted to play his saxophone and was happiest when he was doing it.

Gordon sat on the other side of the table in the small hotel room and ate heartily of his steak. Like his father he enjoyed a good steak every once in a while.

"Jamie, what's wrong?"

"I don't think we needed to do this, Gord," Jamie said holding the side of her head keeping her dyed blonde hair from falling in her food. "Our parents will really never let us see each other now. My father was about to lock me in my room, or so he said. I'm really sorry about dragging you into this. You told me that your dad didn't call the band director, so you're still on for the concert! I don't know what I'm going to do yet."

Gordon swallowed his food before he talked.

"Look, my mom came home from the hospital today and I know dad wanted to have this discussion with your parents as to what to do with us and how to keep us away from each other. I can't have that, Jamie. I love you too much. Ever since we were little," Gordon finished. He put down his silverware and grabbed her hand and rubbed her knuckles.

"Gordon," Jamie said as she rose and came to sit on his lap and put her arms around him. She smoothed back his blonde hair and kissed him.

"I really don't think our parents will want us to be apart. They know we love each other. No one could deny how much our parents love each other. Hell, your mom and dad waited a long time to be together."

"Well, that was dad's fault according to him, so all the more reason we can't take the chance that they will keep us apart!" Gordon responded and kiss Jamie. They embraced and Jamie hung onto Gordon's neck very tightly.

Mike, Rachel, Harvey, Donna and Amanda all sat in the Specters' living room. Kenzie volunteered to take Robbie and DonnaMarie into her room and entertain them.

"Donna, do you have any idea where they might be?"

"I really don't. The only thing I do know is that they could not have gone far. I checked Gordon's savings account and he only took $200 cash. The credit card he took has a small limit on it. Plus, Gordon can be good at covering his tracks. All I can say is that they can't be that faraway. Gordon wouldn't do it," Donna said as she bent forward and put her head in her hands.

"Mom, are you ok?" Mandy asked as she sat next to her mom and rubbed her back.

Donna looked over and said, "Yes, I'm good. Just tired."

Harvey who stood at the mantel with a drink in his hand came over and said, "Donna, I know you want to be a part of this but maybe you should lie down."

Donna looked up and smiled. She reached up and said, "No, Harvey. I'm good. I want to find Gordon and Jamie with you."

Harvey smiled and asked Mandy if she would get her mother a bottle of water.

"Sure thing, Dad. I think mom's right. I know they have a secret meeting place near the high school. It's not outdoors or anything, but it might be that cheap hotel near the highway."

"Mike have you checked the credit card bill lately?" Rachel asked.

"No, let me do it right now. Like you, Jamie's credit line is not long...Rachel, does Jamie still have access to her trust fund that your father set up for her?"

"She's not allowed into that until she's 21. She could not have taken anything out of that unless…" Rachel trailed.

"Unless her grandfather or grandmother was told a story and gave her authorization!" Mike said with a voice that rose in volume. He immediately phoned Florida where Rachel's parents were currently residing.

While Mike was on the phone, Mandy returned with the bottle of water for her mother.

"Hey, I have to get back soon to Harvard, but I can do a turn around town to see if I see Gordon's car."

Donna perked up and stopped drinking her water. She looked at Harvey and then she looked at Mandy.

"Wasn't his car still in the shop?"

"Not that I knew," Mandy said with a scowl on her face.

"Yes, Amanda, your brother's car was in the shop."

"So was Jamie's…" Mike trailed…"until she got the money from her trust fund. Robert told me he authorized a $500 withdrawal."

"Gordon's car bill was $350. When did your brother leave?" Harvey wanted to know.

"Dad I was asleep. I'm sorry. Kenzie might know. She's an early riser. Let me go get her," Mandy rose from the couch again and went to the intercom to call her sister.

"We allowed them to talk and text each other last night, so obviously they planned this getaway", Rachel said to the group.

"All it takes is a wire transfer from Robert's authorization into Jamie's personal account, so that explains how fast she would have gotten the cash," Mike concurred.

"Kenzie will be right down," Mandy said brushing back her own red locks as she again resumed her seat on the couch next to her mother.

Harvey and Donna looked over at the staircase as Donna's mini-me descended the stairs.

"Mom, Dad, Gordon swore me to secrecy. I had no idea he was going to run away. He just told me he was going to get his car and go to school. So, he left the time he would leave to go to school," Kenzie said.

"Thanks, honey," Harvey said. "You can go back to your room if you want."

"Don't tell Gordon I told you because he would be mad at me," Kenzie begged.

Harvey rose walking to the staircase and put his arm around his youngest and gave her a kiss on the top of her head.

"Don't worry pumpkin. We figured it out ourselves. Gordon won't think you squealed."

"Dad?"

"Oh, I know. I'm sorry. Don't worry, "Kenzie". I forgot you're too old for pumpkin," Harvey said looking his daughter in the eye.

"Thanks, dad."

Kenzie flew back up into her room.

"Amanda," Donna said. "Did you say you they had a rendezvous place?"

"It's the Cheapside Hotel around the corner from the high school. Do you want me to go there and try to talk some sense into my brother?"

"No, but if you could lead your dad, Uncle Mike and Aunt Rachel, and me there you'd be free to go back to Cambridge."

"Sure. Let me go fire up my car," Amanda said as she leaped from her seat.

"We'll be right out," Uncle Mike called.

Harvey ran up stairs to let Kenzie know what was happening and that if she could stay here with the Ross' twins it would help him out immensely.

She acquiesced and Harvey immediately picked up his keys and helped his wife up from the couch.

"You guy can ride with us" Harvey said as he gestured to Mike and Rachel.

'Ok, we're in," said Rachel and Mike together.

The four parents rode in the Specters' car following Amanda. Mandy was leaving for Cambridge on the way, so she said she would lead them to the hotel and then head back to school. Amanda honked her car's horn as she sped by alerting her parents to her brother's car parked in the parking lot.

Harvey honked bank and waved as Amanda waving in her rear view mirror acknowledged her father's farewell.

"There's Gordon's car." Donna said as she pointed.

The hotel was a motel, so the rooms had outside entrances. Harvey, Donna, Rachel, and Mike all alighted from the car. They looked for one minute and decided that they must have been in Room 104 because Gordon's car was parked right across from the room.

Harvey knocked. When there was no answer, he tried the door. It was locked.

"Gordon, Jamie!" The four parents called out. They had called for several minutes and tried knocking again. Still no answer.

Soon the manager noticed a problem and walked up to the four adults.

"Are you the manager of this place?" Harvey asked in his most serious voice.

"Yes, what's going on?" The manager asked. The manager was a man of average height and round. He was an older gentlemen, perhaps, a little older than Harvey himself.

"Are two young people in there a girl and a boy?" Harvey asked.

"Yes, they checked in this morning. They showed I.D."

"Did you take a good look at that I.D?" Rachel asked. "They are both under 18."

"Are they your children?" The manager asked seeing the panicking look on their faces.

"Yes, the girl is our daughter," said Rachel pointing between she and Mike.

"The boy is our son," Donna said waving her finger between she and Harvey.

"Well, they are not in there. I saw them go for a walk. Probably near the school."

"Thank you," Harvey said.

"Are they in trouble?"

"Don't worry about that," Donna ventured. "Not only are we their parents but three of us are lawyers."

The manager smiled. "Well, if you want my advice, I would wait here for them. I'm pretty sure they will be back soon. Good luck."

"Well, I think that if we stay here and wait for them they will see we're waiting for them, and they will bolt," Donna said. "Let me go for them and I'll bring them back. If I don't find them I will be back."

"No, Donna, you're just out of the hospital after a concussion. I will go. Gordon is my son and I really think I need to make amends for a couple of things from what I've heard." Harvey asked worriedly as he took Donna's hand.

Donna took Harvey's hands and kissed him. "He needs his father."

Harvey looked at Rachel who did not protest.

"Harvey, you're sure you don't want to do a little good cop, bad cop?" Mike asked.

"No, I think I need to get things straight concerning Jamie, too. I don't want her to be too scared of big bad Uncle Harvey. You know what I mean, Mike."

Mike nodded. "I do. I trust you."

"Thanks, Mike."

Donna kissed Harvey again. They watched as he got in the car and drove away. The Ross' and Donna took seats outside the hotel room on some lawn chairs. The roof from the floor above shading then from the late afternoon sunshine.

Meanwhile, Jamie and Gordon sat on the bleachers talking. As they were talking, Jamie looked out into the distance.

"Uh-oh, your dad found us. He's heading our way."

Gordon stood up, all six-foot frame of him, and stomped his foot. He placed his hands on his hips, "Dad you can just go right back! We're not coming home right now. I wrote you a note. How did you know where to find us?"

As Harvey came to the bleachers all six-foot one-inch frame of him, he looked at Gordon and Jamie both but refrained from speaking until he was standing on the bleacher below them.

"Gordon, Jamie, why did you run away?"

"Because I know my dad doesn't want me to be with Gordon and I guess that you felt that Gordon should not be around me since I seem to be a bad influence on him," Jamie volunteered.

"Jamie, I can speak for myself. Besides that's not the only thing that is driving me away." Gordon sat back down next to Jamie and put his arm around her.

"Kids, Gordon and Jamie, the first thing I want to get straight with you is that we know how much you love one another. Both Jamie's parents and your mom and me can see that you've known each other since you were small, and Gordon I know you're there whenever Jamie needs you. Jamie likes to bring you out of yourself, so you talk to us besides playing your sax."

"I thought you liked me playing my sax," Gordon protested trying to waylay his father's lecture on "other" things.

"Jamie, I am shocked that you introduced Gordon to weed. Did you father ever tell you the first time I met him?"

"Does it have something to do with Marijuana?" Jamie asked squinting in the sunshine as she looked up at Harvey.

Harvey decided he was going to take a seat and sat on the bench below them.

"The day I met your dad he had walked into an interview that he posed as someone else. After I got done shaking his hand no sooner did his briefcase open and there had to be at least $1000 worth of MaryJane in his brief case."

Jamie and Gordon were both shocked because they both thought their parents walked on water.

"So, what did you do?"

"Well, he convinced me after I heard his story that I should hire him and give him a chance to prove that he could be the best damn lawyer I had ever seen."

"I don't see the point. In this case the marijuana looks like it was advantageous," Gordon reasoned.

"Well, you didn't hear his story. He had to make a quick $25,000 to keep his grandmother in the good nursing home as opposed to the kicking her into a state-run facility which is always the worst of conditions."

"My point is that it was a slippery slope. Uncle Mike let that marijuana hang around his neck like an albatross not to mention that he was not a valid lawyer at that time. I just don't want you to think someday because of what has happened that you will be desperate enough to take a risk where you had a choice."

"What about the other thing?"

Harvey smiled. _He thought I'm one to talk. I wanted to bed a 40-year-old redhead when I was 16. So, I know they have to be full of hormones._

"Look, please refrain from sex at this age. I know this is asking a lot but if you cannot restrain yourself please use some protection."

"We haven't had other partners, dad! We're it."

"Good, but I don't mean just from STD's. I'm talking about pregnancy or a yeast infection or an UTI."

"Uncle Harvey, we didn't use anything the first two times, but we know we need to prevent anything like pregnancy or anything else."

"Abstinence is the best at this age, but like I said, and I can speak for all four of the parents, please use protection if you do."

"Dad, could we talk later about this but privately?"

"Sure, Gordon. I'm sure this is a different kind of conversation than what we had with Amanda."

"Did you have a sex talk with Amanda?" Jamie was curious.

"No, it seemed she knew more than Aunt Donna and me," Harvey laughed for a minute.

"Now, can you two please come home so we can all stop worrying?"

Gordon looked at Jamie and then Jamie looked at Gordon then they both looked at Harvey.

"Ok, dad, but there will have to be some changes."

Harvey winked and hugged both Gordon and Jamie.

"We'll see."


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi Folks! I happen to be on a roll with this one! I hope you enjoy this chapter and thank you for the wonderful comments. It really inspires me to write more and more. Thank you. Love - Carebearmaxi**

You Will See…I'm Always Here

Chapter 8

Harvey waited for his son in the old treehouse that Harvey built one December day when Gordon was around five and was trying to fight for his own place away from his older sister. Harvey sat there in his suit with his tie loosened around his neck. The floor was dusty because no one much ever came up here except maybe Kenzie. Harvey was not sure. Kenzie was like Donna, and she would have put her on mark on the place Harvey thought as he sat on the dusty floor with his legs outstretched. Harvey had brought a beer for himself and one for Gordon (with Donna's permission). It was early evening, and everyone had partaken of a sumptuous meal. Mike, Rachel, and their brood stayed for dinner and Harvey had to admit that between his wife and her best friend using the leftovers from the other night provided a meal that a king would envy.

Hence, Harvey decided to venture out to the treehouse which evoked good memories of time spent with just he and his son. Gordon and he had watched numerous sports games and played many a round of Grand Theft Auto out there plus had some heart-to-hearts. Eventually the more Gordon focused on playing his instruments, guitar and sax, the less time Harvey spent with his son. Harvey thought the last time he had been in the treehouse with Gordon was when Gordon had had gotten into a fist fight at school. Gordon had to be around 11 years old.

"Hey, dad. I know I said I wanted to talk to you about some private things, but I didn't think you'd have us come up here."

"What can I tell you? I'm feeling a little nostalgic."

Gordon smirked at that though, but he then crawled on all fours because the treehouse could not accommodate anyone standing in it. Gordon made it to the opposite of the small table where the second beer waited for him.

Gordon pointed at it and asked, "Is this for me?"

"Yes, I talked to your mom. She said you could as long as you don't drive tonight," Harvey said as he opened the bottle.

"Dad, I've driven in worse shape," Gordon said taking a sip of the beverage and laughing.

"You wouldn't be my son if you hadn't. Let me tell you, though, do not do it again!"

"Never again, dad. No problem with that." Gordon held out his bottle for a toast. Harvey clicked and they silently said cheers and took a sip.

"So, Gordo, what did you want to talk about?"

"I wanted to ask you with regard to birth control and protection man-to-man. I know the most part of it. We had sex education at 13 and biology before that. It's just different for a man. I mean from what I know of you being celibate was the last thing on your mind."

"Who told you that? Never mind. I'm sure your mother was trying to prove a point when she told you how I was long before I realized I only needed one woman."

Harvey then said, "Wow, I thought you didn't know a thing. You just made my job easier."

Gordon let out a laugh. He brushed back a lock of his long blonde hair and asked, "How did you know?"

Harvey stopped drinking and said, "I don't think you need "the talk". I think you need to know what love feels like."

Gordon took a sip of his beer and asked, "Do you like Jamie? I mean she was the one to make all the moves because I too shy to do it."

Harvey smiled. Once he was asked by Mike about how Mike would survive after breaking with up with Rachel because of his fraud.

_"I know you have relationships from time to time and they don't tear you apart. How do you do it?" Mike asked distressed._

_ It was in the morning and Harvey was getting ready for work. Before he put on his suit jacket, Harvey shook his head and said, "If you want to know about the law, I'm your man. Love…is not my area."_

After all these years, Harvey knew love. He had always known love, but for ten years he was too stupid to acknowledge it. Furthermore, he had done everything to runaway from it hurting the only woman who was for him and for which he was grateful that she had consented to marry him.

"Jamie is a great girl. She's a little brazen, but I like that in a woman."

"…and she's the eldest daughter of your best friend," Gordon finished.

"Yes, and she's Mike's daughter. Be careful, Gordon. I don't want you to feel obligated to marry her. I know how strong love is, but you have to make sure it's love and not just a feeling stemming from growing up. You may love her, but not be in love with her."

Gordon took another sip of his beer. "How did you know you were in love with mom?"

That was a question that Harvey had pondered a lot over the years.

Harvey sipped his beer taking the bottle slowly from his lips. His face took on a faraway look as Harvey thought back to the first time he met his future wife in a bar many, many years ago.

"Well, I think my subconscious knew it before I did. I shook your mom's hand when she came up to me in a bar a long time ago when we were both at the Manhattan D.A. office. She asked why I took a certain case to trial instead of settling out of court which was my normal play. All I know is that she refused to sleep with me the first night."

"Dad I don't need to picture that in my brain. I'd like to think Mandy, Kenzie, and me were immaculately conceived," Gordon teased taking a big sip of his beer.

Harvey laughed. "I'm sorry. I forgot you haven't been exposed at 17 to things that I was."

"You mean, Grandma Lily."

"Yes. Anyhow, I just felt such a pull toward this beautiful redhead. Always had a thing for them just to let you know."

"How did you know it was love?"

"Not until a few years in when we moved to the firm. I almost lost her a couple of times by my own selfishness and stupidity. However, your mom loved me so unconditionally and took care of me and was gorgeous while she did it. My heart just said one day, "She's the one." It may feel different to you, but do not push it."

"Why not?"

"Because you are so young, you and Jamie. I think you really need to separate for a while, so you can understand that if you're not together it's Jamie you miss. I would say the same for her, as well."

"Love is scary, Gordo. I will not lie, but I would never trade all the time I have had with your mother. "

"Thanks, dad. Now for the other thing…"

The next night Jamie came into her parents' room to find her mom sitting up in bed with her laptop across her thighs, working.

Jamie knocked as her mom seemed to be knee deep in work. Her dad was keeping her younger siblings busy buy playing a game with them. Robbie seemed to have inherited their father's perfect memory, but Mike wanted to make sure, so he was playing a game with both the twins.

"Mom?'

Rachel looked up from her computer. Her case files were strewn all over the bed and on the desk in the room. She had taken on a wrongful termination case and it was proving more challenging than she had expected.

"Jamie, honey, did you need something?"

"Can I talk to you?" Jamie said still hanging on the doorjamb.

"Sure. Do you want to include your dad?"

"No. I just want this to be between me and you."

"Ok. Girl talk. I got it. Take a seat," Rachel invited as she shifted some files to the other side of the bed.

"I just wanted to apologize about today. I really did not want to do it. Gordon somehow wanted to take the reins on this. I did go but reluctantly."

Rachel moved and brushed a lock of dyed blonde hair away from Jamie's face.

"It's ok. You guys listened to Uncle Harvey so he must have been very persuasive for you guys to change your minds so adamantly."

Jamie just looked at her mother for a moment. Jamie had inherited Mike's blue eyes and her skin was something between fair and ivory. Her dark hair was very long like her mother wore it but lately Jamie had wanted to have a different look, so she died her hair blonde. It did not hurt her pretty features on her face but sometimes Jamie took a step back to look at herself.

Rachel smiled. "Do you know what they call used to call Uncle Harvey at the firm when he was young?"

"No, what?"

"The best closer in Manhattan."

Jamie smiled and broke out in laughter. "Why?"

"Because he could negotiate and get the opposition to settle before cases went to court. He got a lot of mileage from that name."

"Well, he did convince Gordon and me to come back so I guess he's still got it," laughed Jamie.

"Mom, how did you know it was love with dad?"

Rachel's eyes widened and she blew out a heavy breath blowing Rachel's shorter locks out of her face.

"Well, I'm sure it's different for everyone. I'm sure it was different for your father as well. Why do you ask?"

"Because I know I love Gordon, but I'm not sure if it's _that_ kind of love. We're close because we grew up together, but I am not sure if that is enough."

"Jamie, you don't have to feel obligated to be with him, you know."

"No, Gordon has said that but I think I have done him a detriment more than helped him."

"Do you feel like you've led him on? I have to say Gordon sometimes seems shy except when he helped you with that brute last year."

"Don't do anything than what you want to do when it comes to being with Gordon or any guy. As to the answer to your question? I was attracted from the beginning, but I did not want your dad to know that. So, I played off that I was too important to fall into the trap of falling for another associate with a law degree."

"I guess, though, once you got to know him it was inevitable."

Rachel pursed her lips and smiled. "Yes, something like that. Your dad needed so much help it wasn't funny."

Mike who had just come to the bedroom door said, "I heard that!"

Harvey and Donna lay in their bed. It was late at night and both Gordon and Kenzie were asleep in their rooms. Mandy had called just about an hour ago to say she got to Cambridge and her apartment. She was just fine.

"How's your head?" Harvey asked holding Donna's hand in his as they lay side by side.

"It's still a bit sore, but I'm fine. I had a helluva time ripping the gauze pad from my stitches. The stitches are fine, but I manage to rip out some more of my hair."

Harvey laughed. "I wondered when you were going to notice you have a bald spot."

Donna quickly hit him on the forearm turning on her side to do so.

"I do not have a bald spot, Specter!"

Harvey was laughing very hard and then he caught her hand and kissed it leaving it clasped in his drawing Donna on top of him.

"So, what do you have in mind?" Donna asked kissing him.

She wore her favorite silky pajamas, a burgundy colored tank top with matching pants. She looked at her husband of twenty years and still got goosebumps when she realized how much she was still in love with him. His eyes had a few more laugh lines and wrinkles, and his hair was leaving him in spots; however, no one could ever tell because he still would wear it in the style he had adopted in his Senior Partner days at the firm. Those eyes were still a deep brown and capable of showing so much that his words still sometimes could not say.

Donna put her arms around his body and felt that he had not aged badly. Although he suffered two mild heart attacks in their life together, he still managed to stay in shape by continuing to box and take walks with her. He and Samantha had a weekly sparring match. She said it helped keep them both in shape.

Harvey suddenly kissed Donna and he said quietly, "I told Gordon earlier in our talk that I was feeling nostalgic. I'm still feeling that way."

Harvey rolled his wife over while they kissed deeply. He stroked her body igniting the fire that still burned between them. He smiled into their kiss when Donna responded by holding him so close to her and wanting more.

The rest of the night was a blur to them both as nostalgia brought their bodies back to the passions originally ignited after years of denial and trying to find what he and she owned but tried to find with other lovers.

Harvey and Donna found renewal again in each other's arms that night.

Later lying softly in his arms, Donna asked the question that she had forgotten with her husband's sudden desire to make love.

"How did your talk go with Gordon?" Donna lay in Harvey's arms stroking his chest and his face. She looked at him and sighed at how peaceful making love with him always left her.

Sleepily, Harvey said, "It went well. He had more philosophical questions about love than actual needing to know about birth control and such."

"I'm sure you steered him in the right direction. You would not be Harvey Specter, the best closer Manhattan has ever seen, if you didn't."

"Donna, this is my son not a court case," Harvey said. "This was so different than when I realized that Amanda had come of age."

"You didn't have much choice. She just went full bore into a relationship with a guy we didn't really know. She made no apologies for it either."

"I wonder where she gets that from," Harvey said laughing and stroking his wife's naked shoulder.

"I saved you. I had the talk with her, but she already knew everything."

"She knew everything at six, Donna. Remember her remark to your sister when she busted in our door that morning after an incredible night."

"Oh my God! _They do it all the time!_ I was so embarrassed in front of my baby sister!" Donna returned laughing just as hearty. Their bed shook with their mirth.

"At least we didn't have to explain where babies came from," Harvey said after his laughter calmed down.

He turned to Donna then and smiled. He stroked her red locks away from her face. He then kissed her deeply. He felt her pulling him to her again. They then stopped and looked at one another.

"Harvey, I think we need to get some sleep. It's amazing how much in love I am with you after all this time," Donna said stroking the back of his head and holding his naked body tight to hers.

"It's still the same for me, too. I love you Donna Specter."

They kissed and then fell asleep in each other's arms.


	9. Chapter 9

**HI Folks! I think I ended this one well. I attempted it to be full circle, and the angst isn't as bad as I originally planned but I think I got my main point across. I hope you enjoyed it. I don't think many did. Anyway, it's finished! Please R & R. Thank you Love - Carebearmaxi**

You'll See…I'm Always Here

Chapter 9

Harvey, Donna, Amanda, Kenzie, and Jamie Ross all sat in the auditorium of the private high school where Amanda graduated the previous eighteen months and Gordon would graduate the next month.

"Here comes his first solo," whispered Donna in Harvey's ear. She was so excited for Gordon. He stood up dressed in his white shirt, tie, and black slacks. The outfit included a vest and a suit jacket. Two weeks earlier, Harvey took Gordon into Manhattan to visit Harvey's tailor since Harvey had started at the firm and was proud to tell him that his son, Gordon J. Specter needed a new tailored three- piece suit.

Gordon thought the situation was over the top, but Harvey reasoned by saying you will also get a new suit for graduation. "Dress to impress."

In the fall, Gordon was going to attend Juilliard's Schuman Academy of Music pursuing a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Jazz performance with probably a minor in some other type of performance. As only 6% of applicants gain acceptance, it was amazing to Gordon that he actually passed the audition. Harvey said he had a client who had a friend on the board and maybe he could pull some strings to which Gordon absolutely protested and said that if he could not get accepted on his own then he would choose a different college. He wanted no nepotism. Harvey admired that in his son and said told him so.

Presently, Gordon stood as he was introduced by his director. He played "Moon River" with such a melodic soft style. Donna wiped a tear from her eye as did Harvey. Mandy looked at her parents and then at the rapt attention that Kenzie was paying to their brother. Mandy had to admit that Gordon was very, very good. Mandy stole a look at Jamie. It was pretty evident that Jamie admired her brother for his playing and other things. Time would tell if what they had together would stick.

There were two other attendants at the concert watching their grandson play both his solos. They were not flesh and blood beings any longer, but they were spirits watching from heaven and smiling because together they were able to do something right. Their advice to their son and his family helped this wonderful event happen.

The concert itself resonated with his grandparents as it was a throwback concert featuring songs from the sixties. Any movie buff would recognize Gordon's two solos because they covered movie music from two prominent ones during that decade. "Moon River" is from _Breakfast at Tiffany's_ and Gordon's second solo "The Shadow of Your Smile" was from _The Sandpiper. _Harvey and Donna smiled at one another because they both remembered long nights spent together in Harvey's office at the firm replete with drinks and good conversation as the now spirit Gordon covered versions of those two songs on a couple of albums. Harvey himself had remembered before that when his father was constantly playing on sessions and was proud that his father was asked by prominent musicians themselves to play on their albums.

Much, much later that night, Gordon was with Jamie. They decided to abstain from sex, but together they felt a little heavy making out was in order. They were downstairs at Mike and Rachel's. Mike and Rachel had been determined to trust the youngsters especially Jamie because they knew how forward she could be. She had assured them that Jamie would not stand in Gordon's way the next year when he attended Juilliard. She wanted him to be all he could be which to Rachel and Mike was a good definition of love for another person.

"Goodnight, you two," Mike said. "You're welcome to stay on the couch, Gordon, if you want to spend the night. Jamie can make you comfortable."

"Thanks, Uncle Mike. Goodnight," Mike mounted the stairs and joined his wife upstairs.

Jamie put her arms around Gordon and kissed him long.

"Wow, what was that for?" Gordon wondered.

"Because I love you and I love your playing. It was like magic. I was transcended."

"It does help to have viewed the movies, I think. Mom happens to love "Breakfast at Tiffany's". It's on her every-so-often-watch rotation," Gordon mentioned.

"What about Uncle Harvey? Doesn't he like it?"

Gordon removed his hair band from his long blonde hair and let it flow over his shoulders and down his chest. He had removed his expensive tie and was aware that if his suit got messed Gordon was responsible for the dry-cleaning bill. His band had a gig in a week, and it looked like it was going to be an elite affair.

"My dad watched it and liked the guy in it, but he fell asleep before it was over. He did wake up, though, when Moon River came on. Did you ever see it?"

"No, I haven't. The song is beautiful, though," Jamie said holding her boyfriend's hand.

" I watched it with her. I liked it. I fell asleep, too, though. Mom kept hitting me. She said she gave up on dad. He was snoring. The whole thing was so funny."

Jamie was giggling so hard she snorted. Gordon smiled, too.

Eventually they stopped and Gordon stroked Jamie's face and said, "I'm glad you're letting your dark hair grow in. I liked you has a blonde, but I like you better as yourself."

"I love you, Gordon Specter."

"I love you, too, Jamie Ross."

Back at the Specters' house, Harvey and Donna lay asleep in bed. Harvey and Donna were still in awe of their only son and how talented he was.

"I swear I could hear my father through his sax," Harvey said as he lay with his arm over Donna's waist.

"You heard our son playing, Harvey. He's that talented. You will have to stop making those comparisons someday. It doesn't help him as much as you think it does."

"Donna, I didn't mean to demean our son. I just meant that he reminded me of my dad."

"I'm sorry, Harvey. It just took Gordon so much time to accept that he was talented that I don't want anything taken away from his talent. I don't mean to demean your father either, but I do know what you mean. While he was playing, I remembered all those nights in your office before we were together. I think that was one of the few times we danced, if I'm not mistaken," Donna said stroking Harvey's arms which lay across her middle.

"I thought the same thing especially on "The Shadow of Your Smile." That was the one we danced, too."

"You remembered the one we danced, too?" Donna asked surprised. "Really?"

"I thought you knew me inside and out by now. I'm a lot more sentimental than you think. I'm also more romantic than what you think, right?" Harvey asked.

Donna turned on her side and placed her arm around Harvey's neck and stroked the back of his head.

"Well, we have three kids which were not immaculately conceived," Donna seductively whispered.

"How about we reenact their conceptions?" Harvey asked kissing her.

Much later near dawn, Harvey heard a voice.

"Harvey."

Harvey was lying on his side with Donna spooned around him.

"Mom? Dad?"

Lily spoke first. "I just wanted to say we enjoyed our grandson's performance. He definitely has a wonderful musical talent."

Gordon then said, "Yes, he does. You also did the right thing in letting him play."

"We think so, too," Harvey whispered.

"There is also something else we need to tell you," Gordon said standing next to the bed that Harvey was sharing with his wife who was sound asleep.

"We no longer will be able to see you this way. We had a job to do, and we did it," Gordon said somewhat with finality

"Yes, it seems our job is completed. However, that does not mean that in times of trouble you can't look to heaven and appeal to us or The Boss," Lily tempered Gordon's statement.

Harvey moved Donna's arm carefully from his chest and sat up. He was still nude from his earlier lovemaking with his wife, so Harvey carefully remained covered. Harvey swiped at his eyes because he realized what his parents were saying to him. This would be their _last_ visit.

"We love you, Harvey. We love Donna and especially our beautiful grandchildren that you have given us," Lily said becoming solid and touching Harvey's face much like she did when he was a little boy and he would rebuff it. This time Harvey put his own hand up and touched his mom's hand pressing it harder to his cheek so he would never forget her touch. She bent and hugged him.

Then it was Gordon's turn. He bent and hugged his son and kissed the side of his head. "You are a wonderful father, Harvey. Much better than I ever was."

Harvey was ready to protest when his parents began to turn transparent like the spirits they were.

"Mom, dad…" Harvey started to cry as he watched them disappear.

In the distance with words that only Harvey could hear was "You'll see…we're always here…"

THE END


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